8 Things We Learned from Wale on The Breakfast Club

Wale on The Breakfast Club

Source: Power 105 / Power 105

Today (Oct. 11) Wale finally dropped his first full length LP in a hot minute in Wow… That’s Crazy, and right on cue the DC rapper swung through The Breakfast Club with a somewhat defensive demeanor.

Sitting down with the morning trio, Wale proved to be one of the most entertaining interviews in a minute as he deflected questions about his love life throughout the interview while questioning everyone’s motives behind their questions. Even still though Wale went into an unknown Grammy experience, his anxiety issues, and why he feels like he’s a “light” in the music industry.

Here are the 8 things we learned from Wale on The Breakfast Club.

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4 days left . #wowThatscrazy

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Wale believes that women (whether right or wrong ones) will always teach you a lot about yourself. He’s also “always been big on women’s intuition.” That being said Wale won’t confirm or deny that he’s in a relationship no matter how hard the morning trio tried to get him to admit something. Even though there’s rumors about him having a “lightskinned girlfriend,” later in the interview he refers to himself as an “eligible bachelor” when explaining why he clubs by himself. Then near the end of the interview he says “shout out to my lady though.” Dios mio…

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I’m goin to Peru .

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Before Megan Thee Stallion became the star she is now, Wale was one of the first rappers to notice her talent and says “everything that I told her was gonna happen is happening now and I’m very proud of her.”

The Latest Hip-Hop News, Music and Media | Hip-Hop Wired

Blue October: Things We Do at Night (Live from Texas) – Norry Niven

Norry Niven - Blue October: Things We Do at Night (Live from Texas)  artwork

Blue October: Things We Do at Night (Live from Texas)

Norry Niven

Genre: Concert Films

Price: $ 14.99

Rental Price: $ 4.99

Release Date: November 20, 2015


Ten years after releasing their live DVD and album, Argue With A Tree, Blue October is set to release Things We Do At Night (Live From Texas). Filmed at the House of Blues in Dallas, Texas, Things We Do At Night (Live From Texas) showcases the live energy and raw emotion Blue October fans have come to love and expect. The live performance covers all of the hits and favorites from the band’s last four albums, Foiled, Approaching Normal, Any Man In America, and Sway.

© © 2015 Up Down Records

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Things You May Learn From Dating Rich Men

The world is quickly changing and today the society is accepting things that would have been unheard of in the past. Today dating older women or rich men isn’t out of the ordinary. This is something that people have quickly embraced as evidenced by the creation of different sites.
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Accent Expert Breaks Down 4 Fascinating Things About Languages

Ever wonder why we pronounce words differently than we did 100 years ago? Dialect coach Erik Singer breaks down four of the most mind-blowing facts we know about human language.
WIRED Videos

WIRED25: Move Fast, Fix Things

WIRED25 is coming back! Following the enormous success of last year’s celebration, WIRED returns to San Francisco this fall with four more days of inspiring events featuring the ideas, innovations and icons working to build a better future. Join us.

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Episode 649 Scott Adams: Debra Messing, Straight Pride Parade and Some Other Things

Content: 

  • Straight Pride Parade and AOC’s tweet mocking their sexual identity
  • Debra Messing’s support for blacklisting people with different opinions
  • My honest opinion on gun control is the ONLY honest opinion
    • Are mass shootings really just fancy suicides?
    • In some situations…MORE guns makes people safer? Test it
  • Storm reporters offering situation updates for Dorian
  • Disney’s Castaway Cay island employees riding out Dorian
  • Viewer questions
    • Diet, vaping, virtual reality sickness, Beto’s IQ, AOC

If you would like my channel to have a wider audience and higher production quality, please donate via my startup (Whenhub.com) at this link: 

I use donations to pay for the daily conversions of the original Periscope videos into Youtube and podcast form, and to improve my production quality and search results over time.

The post Episode 649 Scott Adams: Debra Messing, Straight Pride Parade and Some Other Things appeared first on Scott Adam's Blog.


Scott Adam’s Blog

Ten Things Engineering School Didn’t Teach You

1. There are at least 10 types of capacitors.

2. Theory tells you how a circuit works, not why it does not work.

3. Not everything works according to the specs in the databook.

4. Anything practical you learn will be obsolete before you use it, except the complex math, which you will never use.

5. Engineering is like having an 8 a.m. class and a late afternoon lab every day for the rest of your life.

6. Overtime pay? What overtime pay?

7. Managers, not engineers, rule the world.

8. Always try to fix the hardware with software.

9. If you like junk food, caffeine, and all-nighters, go into software.

10. Dilbert is not a comic strip; it’s a documentary.

Received from ArcaMax Jokes.
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Selfridges Opens Bright New Things Initiative to Sustainable Homeware, Beauty Brands

PRO-PLANET: Selfridges’ Bright New Things initiative is making a comeback for fall and expanding its focus on sustainability, beyond green fashion labels.
For the first time, the young and emerging talent initiative is to include beauty and homeware brands alongside fashion labels that engage in sustainable practices. The initiative is aligned with Selfridges’ “buying better inspiring change” eco-friendly ethos and it aims to make at least 50 percent of the products it sells better for people and the planet by 2022.
“It has never been more vital for business to take note of not only what our customers demand from us, but what our planet needs — fashion, beauty and homeware products that don’t harm the environment,” said Daniella Vega, director of sustainability at Selfridges.
That’s why the British retailer chose to spotlight a new cohort of emerging talent addressing sustainability in an inventive and resourceful fashion, in a bid to inspire change in retail and also voice global concerns about the future of the planet.
The store plans to sell the labels featured in Bright New Things for a minimum of two seasons, beginning Aug. 29.

A dress by Anaak. 
Courtesy Photo

Among the new cohort of eco-labels is GoodWaste, which sources waste materials such as

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8 Things We Learned from Rick Ross on The Breakfast Club

Rick Ross on The Breakfast Club

Source: Power 105 / Power 105

Rick Ross isn’t even a week removed from the release of his latest LP Port of Miami 2 and though it’s an exceptional piece of work more people are speaking his name due to what Nicki Minaj had to say about The Bawse on Joe Budden’s podcast.

Still Ross remains unbothered by petty things and swung through The Breakfast Club where he addressed the situation while keeping things diplomatic and positive. Aside from touching on past and current beefs, Ross also confirmed some interesting things about his street life before the music and why Pusha T’s verse didn’t make the much talked about “Maybach Music VI.”

Here are the 8 things we learned from Rick Ross on The Breakfast Club.

 

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good vibes.great team.its coming. #portofmiami2

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1. Read What?

Ross admits that even though he co-wrote his own memoir Hurricanes, he never actually read it. He is ready to make it into a movie though. He should at least skim through it. Just sayin.’

The Latest Hip-Hop News, Music and Media | Hip-Hop Wired

6 Harmless Things With Insanely Disturbing Origin Stories

By Ryan Menezes,Julia Lange,Tolly Vellis  Published: July 31st, 2019 


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13 Things You Need to Know Before Dating

When it comes to men and women, figuring out what makes the other sex tick can quite a challenge. Read this article in order to get a better insight on how the male and female brain works!
Relationships:Dating Articles from EzineArticles.com

Each and Every – Every Major Movie Reference in Stranger Things

If you’ve ever seen the show Stranger Things, you’ve probably noticed a movie reference or two. Series creators Ross and Matt Duffer are huge film buffs, and they’ve used every opportunity they can to reference some of their favorite movies in Stranger Things. Here is their definitive list of (almost) every movie reference in Stranger Things.

Stranger Things season 3 is streaming now on Netflix.
https://www.netflix.com/watch/80186941?trackId=254015180
WIRED Videos

Oh Sh*t, I Almost Killed You!: A Little Book of Big Things Nursing School Forgot to Teach You – Sonja Schwartzbach, BSN, RN, CCRN

Sonja Schwartzbach, BSN, RN, CCRN - Oh Sh*t, I Almost Killed You!: A Little Book of Big Things Nursing School Forgot to Teach You  artwork

Oh Sh*t, I Almost Killed You!: A Little Book of Big Things Nursing School Forgot to Teach You

Sonja Schwartzbach, BSN, RN, CCRN

Genre: Comedy

Price: $ 9.99

Publish Date: December 25, 2018

© ℗ © 2018 Tantor Audio

iTunes Store: Top Audiobooks in Comedy

Barnwell’s NFL fact check: Don’t be surprised if these seven things happen

Expect Amari Cooper to regress. Same with the Bears’ turnover-happy defense. Here’s why you should never make assumptions in the NFL.
www.espn.com – NFL

Stranger Things’ Natalia Dyer Dazzles in a Red Floral Dress and Boyfriend Charlie Heaton Can’t Look Away

Natalia Dyer, Charlie Heaton, Milan Fashion Week, Salvatore Ferragamo ShowStranger Things actress Natalia Dyer is looking hot, hot, hot!
Gracing the red carpet at the Giffoni Film Festival in Italy, the 22-year-old actress dazzled in a vibrant red and green…


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6 Things We Learned from Freddie Gibbs on The Breakfast Club

Freddie Gibbs on The Breakfast Club

Source: Power 105 / Power 105

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My favorite show.

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Freddie Gibb’s been on his grizzly for a hot minute and though he’s often overlooked in favor of commercial rappers and flavor of the month artists, his recently released project Bandana has been garnering him praise as his best piece of work to date.

Riding high on the release of his latest album, the Hip-Hop veteran sat down for a quick interview with your favorite Hip-Hop morning show and had no qualms about getting into a bevy of subjects and turned as entertaining an interview as you’ll hear today.

From explaining how he got locked up in Austria because of a dream a white woman had about him to opening up about his desire to sign with 50 Cent, Gangsta Gibbs is answers all questions thrown at him with no hairs on his tongue.

Here are the 6 things we learned from Freddie Gibbs on The Breakfast Club.

 

1. Spike Lee

Freddie Gibb’s says when he said “f*ck Spike” Lee for his depiction of Malcolm X on “Flat Tummy Tea” he says was joking. “I like Spike Lee.” He does say some Muslims he knows do have issues with Spike Lee’s classic biopic film.

The Latest Hip-Hop News, Music and Media | Hip-Hop Wired

Five Fun Things to Do in Kemah For Couples

Getting together with your special someone is something we probably don’t do as often as we should, which is why the notion of designating a “date night” has become such a big deal lately. Unfortunately, date night activities can get a little stale, which means that if you are ready to up your game, you might consider checking out all of the fun things to do in Kemah.
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Better Things – EP – Ymori & Pueblo Vista

Ymori & Pueblo Vista - Better Things - EP  artwork

Better Things – EP

Ymori & Pueblo Vista

Genre: Instrumental

Price: $ 2.99

Release Date: November 19, 2018

© ℗ 2018 ⟪ π ṽ ş ⟫

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My Favorite Things – John Coltrane

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My Favorite Things

John Coltrane

Genre: Jazz

Price: $ 7.99

Release Date: December 31, 1960

© ℗ 1960 Atlantic Records. Marketed by Rhino Entertainment Company, a Warner Music Group Company

iTunes Store: Top Albums in Jazz

As Swim’s Growth Slows, Miami Swim Market Shakes Things Up

On the cusp of the annual Miami swim market, whose trade shows, runway presentations and activations are scheduled from July 11 to 16, the category appears to be as saturated as a wet swimsuit after a dive into the pool.
Marshal Cohen, chief industry adviser, retail, at The NPD Group, said other than being the victim of its own success as new and existing brands, including mass-market retailers, piled on product, resortwear’s and swim’s robust growth has fallen flat as consumers buy the same quantity but at lower prices. He also noted that both categories’ early adoption of new uses, such as beach to street versatility, has been undermined by ath-leisure. Another culprit is climate change, which is wreaking havoc on traditional weather patterns — the U.S. is coming off its wettest 12 months in history, while summer forecasts for below and above average temperatures could keep more people indoors.
“Swimwear has to get its mojo back and find growth outside the market,” said Cohen, of a sentiment felt across fashion from sportswear to trade shows, both of which have expanded well beyond their niches. “Innovation is paramount, too, so swimwear needs a wide-open throttle rather than waiting around for replenishment to

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Decoding all those ‘Stranger Things’ ’80s pop culture references

It’s 1985, and the only thing Hawkins, Indiana, has more of than bizarre supernatural/pseudo-scientific phenomena is a plethora of pop culture touchstones. One can be a major “Stranger Things” fan and either be too young to have any memories of the over-the-top decade in which Season 3 is set, or emerged from the Reagan Era with too-fuzzy recall, perhaps owing to when you didn’t “Just Say No.”


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GamersGate: The World's Largest Online Game Store

4 Things to Consider to Get a Guy’s Attention

Trying to get a guy’s attention can be quite intimidating and scary for many. The ability to show your confidence is likely to be the most important factor to consider, although there are many other things that can be helpful to get someone’s attention.
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Is ‘Stranger Things’ sparking your nostalgia? Here’s what to watch next

“Stranger Things” has never scrimped on TV and movie references and homages, with a lengthy laundry list of Stephen King shout-outs alone, starting with “Stand By Me” and “It.”


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GamersGate: The World's Largest Online Game Store

‘Stranger Things’ tackles teen troubles in third season

More puberty, more problems is the rough mantra for the new season of “Stranger Things,” which builds upon the story so far without bending the mold in the mix of ’80s nostalgia and more movie/TV references than you can shake a library of Stephen King books at.


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GamersGate: The World's Largest Online Game Store

A ‘Stranger Things’ refresher because it’s OK if you’ve forgotten what’s happened so far

“Stranger Things” will gain its independence from the Upside Down when the third season debuts July 4.


CNN.com – RSS Channel – Entertainment

GamersGate: The World's Largest Online Game Store

Stranger Things is Getting a New Mall! But Today Malls Are Dying. What Happened?

The 1980’s nostalgia and sci-fi show Stranger Things returns for season three with a new setting: The Starcourt Mall. WIRED’s Emily Dreyfuss talks with architecture professor Ellen Dunham-Jones about mall culture and the fate of dead malls. Hint, zombies.
WIRED Videos

Stranger Things Season 3 Premiere: See Every Look as the Stars Arrive

Millie Bobby Brown, Stranger Things Season 3 premiereHawkins, Indiana is going Hollywood!
The cast of Netflix’s Stranger Things turned out on Friday evening for the Season 3 world premiere, which took place in Santa Monica, Calif. Stars…


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5 Things to Keep in Mind When Opting for the Best Online Dating Site

Nowadays, we can do a lot of things on the Internet. For instance, you can buy grocery, plan your vacation, or get a job online. In the same way, you can look for a date online. However, it’s not as easy as it sounds. If you are looking for a dating partner online, we suggest that you keep a few things in mind. We have discussed some of them in this article. Read on to know more.
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The Little Things – Cindy Bradley

Cindy Bradley - The Little Things  artwork

The Little Things

Cindy Bradley

Genre: Smooth Jazz

Price: $ 9.99

Release Date: May 31, 2019

© ℗ 2019 Trippin N Rhythm Records

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So Much Things to Say: The Oral History of Bob Marley (Unabridged) – Roger Steffens & Linton Kwesi Johnson

Roger Steffens & Linton Kwesi Johnson - So Much Things to Say: The Oral History of Bob Marley (Unabridged)  artwork

So Much Things to Say: The Oral History of Bob Marley (Unabridged)

Roger Steffens & Linton Kwesi Johnson

Genre: Arts & Entertainment

Price: $ 26.95

Publish Date: July 11, 2017

© ℗ © 2017 HighBridge, a Division of Recorded Books

iTunes Store: Top Audiobooks in Arts & Entertainment

Things To Remember When Planning To Join Speed Dating

For many relationship experts, doing a move to finally meet your lifetime partner is a very smart thing especially these days there are already a lot of mediums to use in finding a potential life partner. And with how busy everybody is these days, what people experience most of the time are meaningless social collisions instead of quality social interactions. This is mainly the reason why it’s important to be more mindful or even deliberate when it comes to dating.
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Two Things That Lead You to Lose Your Self-Confidence Amidst a Divorce

Divorce, job loss, or the crumbling of a relationship are examples of sudden life-changing events that can cause pain and suffering–whether you saw them coming or not. Chances are pretty good that when a sudden soul-crushing event happens to you, anger and sadness quickly turn to blame, which can take two forms.

BLAMING OTHERS

You can blame others and point the finger at somebody or something that you feel caused your pain and suffering. In blaming others, you identify yourself as victim because it was done to you.

The reality is that sometimes IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT. Others may be squarely to blame for your circumstances, and you may have had no control over what happened to you. In other cases, you may just find that it’s easier to point the finger at someone to justify your anger, hide your humiliation, and satisfy your ego.

BLAMING YOURSELF

You can also blame yourself. In doing this, you identify as a victim of your own making because you feel like it was done by you. You feel that you have done something bad or wrong that contributed to the situation; this is why blaming yourself is most often partnered with feelings of guilt.

Fabulous, right? That’s just the cherry you needed to top the sh*tstorm sundae in front of you!

In both circumstances, when you become a victim, you give up your power. In a recent blog in the Huffington Post, Karen Covy, a divorce attorney and life advisor, said that guilt “strips your power away from you faster than a vacuum cleaner sucks dirt from your carpet.

“Guilt is a feeling. It comes from your heart, not your head. But it starts when your head tells your heart that you have done something bad or wrong. Getting divorced is not necessarily bad or wrong. It is also not necessarily good or right either. The truth is that divorce is whatever you make of it.” The same could be said of losing your job, or the crumbling of a relationship. The truth is, it’s whatever you make it.

If we focus on guilt, we lose our power, and when we lose our power, fear takes over. When fear rules the day, you have two options.

Option one is to push down the fear; you hide it and pretend it’s not there. It’s like trying to hold a balloon under water; you have to apply so much pressure to keep it down that eventually it’s just going to shoot right up to the surface.

Option two is to address your fear. Acknowledge it, walk with it hand and hand, and feel it instead of treating it like the enemy. Figure out what your fear is and whether or not it has any truth to it.

At one end of the spectrum you have blame, guilt, fear and powerlessness; at the other end of the spectrum you have accountability and power. Moving to the positive side of the spectrum and taking your power back is your responsibility.

It doesn’t matter if something was done to you or by you. It doesn’t matter if it was right or wrong. It doesn’t matter if it was fair or unfair. What matters is that you alone are responsible for how you move forward. You are responsible for your own happiness. If you contributed to the situation, own it and forgive yourself for it. You are human and you are okay!

And if you’re reading this post RIGHT NOW, then you’re in a unique position to find out exactly how to take back your power and move forward, feel confident and be happy.

Now that you know about the consequences of playing the pain-blame game, I’ve created a DETAILED, free guide to help you gain back, and hold onto, your power.

My wish for you is to sidestep the countless traps that make most divorce recoveries epic disasters, and instead be able to move forward and feel confident because you own your power. I’ve been focusing on resilience for over 7 years now and I’ve made MANY mistakes along the way. You don’t need to do the same! I’ve compiled a list of 4 easy ways to take back your power (and keep it). To learn how to take your power back, download my FREE GUIDE:

4 Ways to Take Back Your Power After a Divorce

You can use these lessons over and over again in your life.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.




Divorce – The Huffington Post

Need to File for a Divorce!

Pervertables: Converting Everyday Things into Kinky Toys

Orpheus Black walks you through how to repurpose everyday items into kinky play toys, as well as how to modify every day items into fun cost effective SM instruments that you will love. You’ll learn where to buy great makeshift toys but how to select the best pervertables for your money, including what potential pervertable items to avoid. Discover how to do fast, simple bondage with everyday items and use homemade paddles and other spanking implements, canes, and DIY restraints. None of these items require any special tools and can be made in minutes.
Kink University Gallery Update

Pervertables: Converting Everyday Things into Kinky Toys

Orpheus Black walks you through how to repurpose everyday items into kinky play toys, as well as how to modify every day items into fun cost effective SM instruments that you will love. You’ll learn where to buy great makeshift toys but how to select the best pervertables for your money, including what potential pervertable items to avoid. Discover how to do fast, simple bondage with everyday items and use homemade paddles and other spanking implements, canes, and DIY restraints. None of these items require any special tools and can be made in minutes.
Kink University Gallery Update

Pervertables: Converting Everyday Things into Kinky Toys

Orpheus Black walks you through how to repurpose everyday items into kinky play toys, as well as how to modify every day items into fun cost effective SM instruments that you will love. You’ll learn where to buy great makeshift toys but how to select the best pervertables for your money, including what potential pervertable items to avoid. Discover how to do fast, simple bondage with everyday items and use homemade paddles and other spanking implements, canes, and DIY restraints. None of these items require any special tools and can be made in minutes.
Kink University Gallery Update

Pervertables: Converting Everyday Things into Kinky Toys

Orpheus Black walks you through how to repurpose everyday items into kinky play toys, as well as how to modify every day items into fun cost effective SM instruments that you will love. You’ll learn where to buy great makeshift toys but how to select the best pervertables for your money, including what potential pervertable items to avoid. Discover how to do fast, simple bondage with everyday items and use homemade paddles and other spanking implements, canes, and DIY restraints. None of these items require any special tools and can be made in minutes.
Kink University Gallery Update

The Things We Do To Find People Who Feel Like Us – Beach Slang

Beach Slang - The Things We Do To Find People Who Feel Like Us  artwork

The Things We Do To Find People Who Feel Like Us

Beach Slang

Genre: Alternative

Price: $ 9.99

Release Date: October 30, 2015

© ℗ 2015 Polyvinyl Records

iTunes Store: Top Albums in Alternative

News in Brief: Report: Nation Spends $50 Billion Annually To Get Kids Excited About Things

WASHINGTON—Taking into account investments by government agencies, nonprofit organizations, and private industry, a report released Friday by the Pew Research Center revealed that a total of $ 50 billion is spent annually in the U.S. to get kids excited about things. “Each day in this country, well over $ 100 million is spent on efforts to take something, such as reading, science, going outdoors, or breakfast, and get kids excited about it,” said lead researcher Michael Hazlett, adding that in 2014 alone, over $ 10 billion was spent on getting kids excited about fruit. “In addition to the $ 50 billion that goes toward getting kids excited about fitness or dental hygiene or any number of other things, we found that an even larger sum of $ 65 billion is then spent each year on making those things fun.” The report concluded that at any given moment, an average of 0.3 percent …




The Onion

6 Things Working Women Should Never Write in Email

working women

By now, you’ve likely heard about the essay Jennifer Lawrence wrote for the Lenny newsletter discussing the gender pay gap earlier this week. If not, here’s a quick synopsis: JLaw explained that after the Sony hack—which leaked emails showing she took home a lot less money than her American Hustle male costars Jeremy Renner, Christian Bale, and Bradley Cooper—she was mad. Not at Sony necessarily, but at herself. “I failed as a negotiator because I gave up early,” Lawrence wrote. She goes on to add that she didn’t barter aggressively because she didn’t want to be perceived as abrasive, but concludes by writing: “I’m over trying to find the ‘adorable’ way to state my opinion and still be likable!” Amen, sister.

On the heels of this, Alexandra Petri at The Washington Post geniusly took things one step further—identifying a language called “Woman in a Meeting,” and then translating famous sentences in history into how a woman in a meeting would have said them (An example: “Give me liberty, or give me death.” Woman in a Meeting: “Dave, if I could, I could just—I just really feel like if we had liberty it would be terrific, and the alternative would just be awful, you know? That’s just how it strikes me. I don’t know.”)

As a women’s studies minor and English literature major who’s now a working mom, and who’s read Tina Fey’s Bossy Pants, Sheryl Sandberg’s Lean In, and Anne Marie Slaughter’s “Why Women Still Can’t Have It All,” this kind of speak is something I think about a lot. I’ve definitely recast an email a time or two because I’m cognizant of the Woman in a Meeting linguistic crutches and I don’t want to succumb to them. Sometimes I succeed—and sometimes I fail, giving in to the societal pull to sound less direct than I’d like out of a fear of seeming pushy, bossy, or, worst of all, shrill. I can guarantee these are things most men don’t spend time pondering. Don’t misread me, I’m not saying their way is always the right way. What I am saying is I’ve compiled a list of five words and phrases I’m actively trying to ban from sent folder. Working women: Please take note.

1. “I’m sorry . . .”
I’m not sorry anymore! We have to stop apologizing for asking people to do things, particularly when it’s something that’s part of their job.

2. “Just . . .”
We need to stop using this word as a way to weaken a request or our opinion.

3. “This might be a stupid question but . . .”
Like they said in school, there are no stupid questions. Well, sometimes there are—but ask, don’t caveat.

4. “I may be wrong but . . .”
Don’t lessen the impact of what you say before you say it.

5. “If you want my two cents . . . ”
A man usually gives his three cents and he certainly doesn’t offset it with this phrase.

6. “Does this make sense?”
I do this one a lot, and I can’t stand it. Trust that what you wrote makes sense. Don’t openly question in email whether or not your thinking is sensical.

The post 6 Things Working Women Should Never Write in Email appeared first on Vogue.

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8 Things You Didn’t Know About Taylor Swift’s ‘1989’

Taylor Swift has recently shared 3 separate videos from Grammy Pro in which she explains the work behind 1989, featuring song-by-song analysis and intel on how the tunes came together.
News, reviews, interviews and more for top artists and albums – MSN Music
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9 Things We Learned From Joe Budden On The Breakfast Club

There never will be a time where Joe Budden won’t be entertaining on The Breakfast Club. The polarizing MC who somehow also functions as an open book could circle back on the show the very next day and still make for an entertaining conversation, word to his successful podcast.

joe-budden-on-the-breakfast-club

Budden is back on the scene–musically–with a new album named All Love Lost dropping at the end of the week but that comes secondary to all the other drama that surrounds his life. Check out all the highlights we learned from Joe Budden on The Breakfast Club in the gallery below.


Photo: Instagram/The Breakfast Club

The post 9 Things We Learned From Joe Budden On The Breakfast Club appeared first on Hip-Hop Wired.

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The 11 Most Ridiculous Things From Last Night’s ‘The Walking Dead’ Premiere

The 11 Most Ridiculous Things From Last Night's 'The Walking Dead' Premiere

The 11 Most Ridiculous Things From La…
Do you like zombies? Do you also like black-and-white television? Then last night’s ‘The Walking Dead’ Season 6 premiere is right up your alley!
Submitted by: Dashiell Driscoll
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Keywords: the walking dead twd the walking dead s06e01 First Time Again walking dead first time again rick grimes daryl dixon alexandria abraham gif walking dead gif walking dead gifs walking dead recap balloon morgan carl judith carol black and white
Views: 92,494

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12 Things Men Wish Women Would Do On Dates

A while back, we asked women who read HuffPost Divorce to share the one thing they wish more men would do on dates. (One standout response? Actually ask her on a date — past a certain age, no one wants to “hang out and chill.”) 

But what about the guys? What do men past a certain age want to see more of on dates? Below, HuffPost Divorce bloggers share what they wish more women would do before, during and after dates.

Take it away, guys. 

1. “If we’ve never met before, make a definite first move to establish whether we’re doing a handshake or hug. Doesn’t matter which, just help ease that awkward first greeting.” — Barry Gold 

2. “Please forgive the first 10 dumb things I say and do (if they are not deal-breakers for you) as I’m a mess. The second date will be better, I promise.”  – Antonio Sacre, author of My Name is Cool: Stories from a Cuban-Irish-American Storyteller 

 3. ”Don’t ask why I’m divorced until at least the third date. I know you want to know about past relationships but on the first date I’m not ready.” – Elliott Katz, author of Being the Strong Man a Woman Wants: Timeless Wisdom on Being a Man

4. “Let me hold the door open for you.” – Chad Stone, author of The Love Magnet Rules

5. ”If you are a heart surgeon waiting for an urgent text to save someone’s life, by all means, have your phone on the table. Otherwise, please put it away.” – Antonio Sacre

6. “Offer to pay. I have no problem paying for dinner but please at least give us ‘the reach.’ Make a move for the check  a) so the guy can say, ’Please, let me get this!’ and b) it proves you are at least interested enough to invest in the evening.” – Craig Tomashoff

7. “Compliment us.  I work out and one of the reasons I do so — outside of staying healthy — is so women can see that I’m a man who takes care of himself.” – Lee Kronert, author of Mental Cruelty: A Novel for Divorced Men

8. “A little encouragement goes a long way. Silence is not golden. ‘I’m having fun’ is cool.” — Ken Solin, author of The Boomer Guide to Finding True Love Online

9. “Disagree with us! Quiz us. Debate us. Really throw down the gauntlet by claiming ‘Die Hard’ isn’t the greatest movie of all time. Challenging us means you’re interested in how we think and that’s the sexiest experience a guy could ask for.” –– Craig Tomashoff

10. “During the date, a light touch on the hand or arm says a lot about your interest in us. No, we won’t consider it foreplay.” — Ken Solin 

11. “Don’t talk badly about your ex because if you are going to talk badly about him, then I have no doubt that at some point, you’ll be talking badly about me to some other stranger.” — Al DeLuise

 12. “After a date, please pick up the phone when I call. A call means I really like you.” – Chad Stone

More from HuffPost:  

 

 

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Divorce – The Huffington Post

Need to File for a Divorce!

19 Things No Woman Should Have To Apologize For

1. Existing in a body, no matter what that body looks like. Leaving your “too skinny,” “too fat,” “too pear-shaped” judgments at the door. Self-hatred takes way too much time and energy, and you don’t owe anyone an explanation for your body type.

2. Loving how she looks. You’re badass and beautiful, and should be allowed to know that and admit it.

3. Having a strong opinion. Change comes from those who speak up.

4. Expressing said strong opinion on the Internet. Being a woman on the Internet can provide an incredible outlet for expression and access many supportive communities. It can also be a cesspool of garbage humans spewing said garbage into your Twitter/Tumblr/Instagram/Facebook feed. (See this, this and this if you’re not sure what I’m talking about.) A troll’s abuse should not trump a woman’s right to speak her mind.

5. Being single. No, you are not defined by your lack of a romantic partner, no matter how young or old you are.

6. Being in a relationship. No, you are not defined by your romantic partner, no matter how young or old you are.

7. Wanting a relationship. There’s no shame in looking for love and expressing that you wish it was something you had.

8. Not wanting a relationship. You do you, girl.

9. Wanting to have children. Own your desires. And remember that a partner is not necessarily required to fulfill this one.

10. Not wanting to have children. People love to ask childfree women if/when/why they are or are not going to have kids. But if you want to be childfree, you don’t owe anyone answers to needlessly invasive questions about your reproductive plans.

11. Having an abortion. Your body, your (legal and constitutionally protected!) choice.

12. Not smiling every waking moment of every day. FYI, random men on the street, we don’t grin ear to ear on our way to work every morning because we aren’t cyborgs.

13. Making more money than a male partner. Or a female partner, for that matter.

14. Being ambitious. In the words of Beyoncé: “I’m not bossy, I’m the boss.”

15. Her success. If someone is going to be threatened by what you’ve accomplished, then #BYE. 

16. Having sex. Screw being slut-shamed. If it’s fun and consensual, more power to you. 

17. Not having sex. It’s your body, so you decide where your boundaries are.

18. Having emotions — and showing that you have them. Feel free to be sad/angry/overjoyed/frustrated/ecstatic, and show it any goddamn way you see fit.

19. Not being enough. Because, you are.

Also on HuffPost:  

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Style – The Huffington Post
FASHION NEWS UPDATE-Visit Shoe Deals Online today for the hottest deals online for shoes!

9 Super Awkward Things About Sex After 50

We all know that sex doesn’t stop at age 50. For proof, look no further than the high rates of sexually transmitted disease that plague the 50+ population. But things do change a bit in the bedroom.

1. You may decide that beach sex is not worth it.

The urban dictionary defines “having sand in your vagina” as someone who complains about the little things or is unduly irritated by something. We would like to set the record straight: Real sand in your real vagina is a real thing and is way more than a little irritating. Nobody wants to have it, or the vaginal infection that invariably follows.

 2. It could take longer to get the ball rolling, so to speak.

Some older men experience erectile dysfunction and have a harder time getting and sustaining an erection. Some older women take longer to get aroused. The end result is that sometimes, you both may fall asleep trying. 

3. You only think that sending your kids off to college will make the living room rug a clothing-optional location.

4. The dog believes her job is to sleep between you and if you were being honest, sometimes you’re not totally unhappy about it.

5. Women in the throes of hot flashes do not want anyone to touch them — anywhere.

6. While “Modern Family’s” Claire and Phil Dunphy can pretend they are strangers who meet in a hotel bar and get a room, one of you is bound to laugh and the other one is likely to fret over the cost of a hotel tryst.

But you can certainly endorse the poor man’s version where you arrive in separate cars in a bar and sit across the room making goo-goo eyes until one of you sends over a drink.

7. Leakage happens.

My oh my, the things we don’t talk about! Urinary incontinence during sexual intercourse is a common, but rarely volunteered, problem. A British study found that 24 percent of women experience it. In about two-thirds of the cases, the leakage occurs when the penis penetrates the vagina. One-third of the time, the leakage occurs only at orgasm. The likely cause is an irritable bladder or a weakness at the neck of the bladder. See your doctor; there’s a pill for that.

 8. The kitchen counter was never comfortable but now you are old enough to say it.

 

But sharing a bath? That’s another story, one with a happy ending even if one partner needs to be persuaded.

9. If someone mentions Plato’s Retreat, you have a senior moment.

Right along with swinger parties, there are some things best left in the past.

Also on Huff/Post:

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.




Divorce – The Huffington Post

Need to File for a Divorce!

Miguel Ft. Chris Brown & Future – “Simple Things” (Remix)

Miguel puts out the official remix to his song “Simple Things” which is off of his Wildhearts album. For the remix he enlists the services of Chris Brown and Future; Brook Dleau alongside Miguel handle the production.


Filed under: Music, Trending Tagged: Chris Brown, Future, Miguel
Hip Hop News, Interviews and Music: Allhiphop.com

Miguel Drops “Simple Things (Remix)” ft. Chris Brown & Future | Wired Tracks 10.9.15

Miguel gives his Wildheart track “Simple Things” a proper remix to close out the week.

The Los Angeles crooner teamed up with RCA label mate Chris Brown and the currennt king of autotune and croon Future to give the buttery smooth tune some extra life. This time, Nayvadius leaves the true singers to their man their crafts, while he delivers some bars.

Find the “Simple Things (Remix)” below in Wired Tracks, where French Montana’s “Freaky,” featuring Fetty Wap and Monty Zoo, also appears.

Photo: Instagram

French Montana ft. Fetty Wap & Monty Zoo – “Freaky”

Roya ft. Shaggy – “Lie (Remix)”

Sheek Louch – “Bout It Gorillaz”

Tiara Thomas – “Trust Me”

Chris Rivers ft. Uncle Murda – “I Declare War”

Jake Barker ft. Boldy James – “Ambalance”

John Givez – “Soular Power”

Kooley High – “Under the Sun”

The post Miguel Drops “Simple Things (Remix)” ft. Chris Brown & Future | Wired Tracks 10.9.15 appeared first on Hip-Hop Wired.

Hip-Hop Wired

6 Things Men Complain About In Marriage Counseling

What do husbands talk about — and more pointedly, complain about — when they sit down with their partner and a marriage therapist?

Below, three psychotherapists who work extensively with couples share the biggest issues that men say cause friction in their marriages. 

1. My wife expects me to be a mind reader. 

Men talk a lot about how unfair it is that they’re expected to know exactly what their wives are thinking and feeling at all times, said Marcia Naomi Berger, a psychotherapist and author of Marriage Meetings for Lasting Love: 30 Minutes to the Relationship You’ve Always Wanted. Then when the husbands misread the situation, they feel like they’re somehow the bad guy. 

“It’s so wrong for women to assume, ‘My partner should know how I feel and what I want. I shouldn’t have to tell him,'” said Berger. “Wives should be direct but husbands can also help by encouraging their spouses to say specifically what they want. Then, he should either accommodate or negotiate so both of their needs are met.” 

2. The late night arguments are getting out of hand. 

He’s just about to drift off to sleep… and then his wife rolls over and brings up some major household or relationship issue that needs addressing right away, sleep be damned. It may sound like a relatively minor problem, but it’s an almost universal complaint among married men, said Elisabeth J. LaMotte, a couples psychotherapist and founder of the DC Counseling and Psychotherapy Center.

“Often, from the woman’s perspective, the topic feels so important that she can’t possibly sleep until things have been adequately discussed,” LaMotte explained. “But for many men, this is the least appealing time to talk. They feel like their exhaustion and need to sleep is being dismissed by their wives.” 

To curb unexpected late-night convos, LaMotte suggests carving out some time — maybe it’s 10 minutes after work or right after dinner — when spouses can give their full attention and mental energy to issues that matter.

3. She doesn’t appreciate me. 

When speaking with husbands who’ve cheated, psychotherapist and Neuman Method co-creator M. Gary Neuman said the biggest complaint usually isn’t a lackluster sex life, but rather feeling under-appreciated by their wives.

“The problem is, too many women think that if they are overly appreciative to their husbands, they’ll reduce their husband’s desire to please her. It’s quite the opposite. actually. Men are energized when they feel their wives are appreciating them,” he said.

4. She doesn’t back me up when I discipline the kids. 

To be an effective parenting team, you need to establish a genuinely united front for the kids’ sake: When dad says to take it easy on the Halloween candy, mom needs to back him up. But Berger said many husbands complain about having to go it alone on discipline. 

“They feel like there’s no backup,’ she said. “Couples really need to support each other in front of the kids and talk to each other in advance so they can agree on what disciplinary action will occur. When children know their parents disagree about what they’re allowed to do or on consequences for breaking rules, they’re likely to play one parent against the other — and that only results in stress for the couple.” 

5.  She’s not interested in sex.

Sex may not be as hot and heavy as it used to be, but for most couples, it still needs to be a priority. Neuman said that men often complain that they’re starting to feel more like roommates than spouses — their wives just don’t seem interested in sex anymore.

“The biggest complaint in the intimacy department for men is not about how satisfying sex is with their wives, but that they feel there’s simply not enough,” he said.

The solution doesn’t rest squarely on wives’ shoulders, said Neuman; husbands need to work on fostering intimacy by lending their wives some support outside the bedroom. 

“Research shows that when men split the duties of household chores and child-rearing, they have more sex,” he said. “Couples need to talk about what will make both of them happier — what each need in order to create a more intimate relationship.”

6. Our marriage is no longer a priority for her. 

In therapy sessions, men tell Berger that at some point in time, they feel like their marriage took a backseat to nearly everything else in their wives’ lives: the kids, her career, nights out with friends. To rebuild that sense of partnership, Berger tells couples to make a real effort to go on date nights once a week. 

“It should be a time to relax and daydream out loud, like when you were courting — before the responsibilities of married life kicked in!” she said. “Then also schedule marriage meetings where you work on resolving issues and fostering teamwork within your marriage.”

Date nights — along with loosely structured conversations about marriage and family responsibilities – should go a long way in bringing spouses closer together, Berger said.

More From HuffPost: 

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Divorce – The Huffington Post

Need to File for a Divorce!

8 Things I Wish I Could Tell My Newly Divorced, 27-Year-Old Self

When I was 27, my marriage ended after just two years and seven months.

First came shock, then came denial, then came an outpouring of grief. Then reality set in, and what followed was a painstaking healing process. At times I thought I would never come out the other side in one piece. Yet two years later, I am happily divorced and loving my life.

Despite this, my heart still aches for my newly separated self in the throes of grief; I wish I could share with her some of the things I’ve learned and tell her it’s all going to be okay. I’d tell her:

1. You did everything you could. Stop torturing yourself by wondering what you could have done differently. There is nothing more you could have done and you should be proud of hanging in there for as long as you did. You deserve some kind of good wife medal for all the crap you went through.

2. You have nothing to be ashamed of. When you got married, it felt as though you were declaring your love to the whole entire world. It feels now like you have to declare that you couldn’t make it work to the world. I know it feels like the shame of admitting your marriage failed at age 27 is too much to bear, but remember this; the shame is not yours to bear at all.

3. You need to accept that he is going to move on to a new relationship. I know, I know — it’s the news that you’re dreading the most, the news that turns your stomach inside out with sickness. But he’s going to move on. On the day you find out, you are going to feel like your heart has been ripped out but in time, you’ll digest the information, accept it and absolutely be okay with it. Promise.

4. You aren’t going to move on quite so quickly. Initially, you will feel like the most unlovable human on the planet and that no one will ever look in your direction again. When this passes, you will enjoy a few flirtations. Next, you will panic that you haven’t met someone to get serious with and therefore make profiles on dodgy dating websites, go on bad dates and spend a lot of time questioning your inability to meet someone “normal”. Eventually, you’re going to realize that you simply are not ready to move on to a new relationship — and that it is completely okay to take your time (and have some fun in the meantime).

5. You’re really going to benefit from therapy and medication.
Sometimes in life, things get shitty and we need a little extra help. This is one of those times. You will attend counseling sessions with a brilliant therapist, who helps you realize that every negative thing you thought about yourself was wrong. You’re also going to go on antidepressants, which are going to help lift you out of this awful, can’t-get-out-of-bed fog. This is not something to fear or be ashamed of — by asking for help you’re actually very brave.

6. You are about to learn how amazing the people in your life are.
I mean, you already know this but you’re about to realize it a whole lot more. They will listen when you need to talk, patiently let you cry about the same thing, make you laugh, give you wine/cake at appropriate times, take you on surprise trips, force you to get out of bed and get dressed and at times, give you some harsh perspective. You are so very lucky to have them.

7. You will feel better once you make your peace.
Being angry is a terrible waste of energy. Over time you will realize that, to truly move on, you need to forgive your ex. The anger will eventually subside into indifference. You will be able to acknowledge that you loved him, you married him for a reason and wish him nothing but the best. The sooner you let go of the anger and hurt, the sooner you will start to live the life you deserve.

8. You are about to start living your dreams.
I have great news. You know the dreams and aspirations you put on hold to settle down and get married young? From job goals to visiting different corners of the globe to taking up new hobbies? You’re about to start living them. You’re going to make new friends and say “yes” to every crazy idea thrown your way; you’re going to go on trips of a lifetime, dance ’til dawn at music festivals and take up singing and writing again; you’re going to climb the career ladder rung by rung and set up a new life in the city of your dreams. What’s more, all of this is only the start. Your life is about to get seriously amazing. Hang in there.

Also on HuffPost:

If you divorced in your 20s and learned a lot about love, life and yourself in the process, we’d love to hear your story for our series, Divorced By 30. Send us a 500-800-word essay or an idea for a blog post to divorcedby30@huffingtonpost.com

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Divorce – The Huffington Post

Need to File for a Divorce!

6 Things Men Complain About In Marriage Counseling

What do husbands talk about — and more pointedly, complain about — when they sit down with their partner and a marriage therapist?

Below, three psychotherapists who work extensively with couples share the biggest issues that men say cause friction in their marriages. 

1. My wife expects me to be a mind reader. 

Men talk a lot about how unfair it is that they’re expected to know exactly what their wives are thinking and feeling at all times, said Marcia Naomi Berger, a psychotherapist and author of Marriage Meetings for Lasting Love: 30 Minutes to the Relationship You’ve Always Wanted. Then when the husbands misread the situation, they feel like they’re somehow the bad guy. 

“It’s so wrong for women to assume, ‘My partner should know how I feel and what I want. I shouldn’t have to tell him,'” said Berger. “Wives should be direct but husbands can also help by encouraging their spouses to say specifically what they want. Then, he should either accommodate or negotiate so both of their needs are met.” 

2. The late night arguments are getting out of hand. 

He’s just about to drift off to sleep… and then his wife rolls over and brings up some major household or relationship issue that needs addressing right away, sleep be damned. It may sound like a relatively minor problem, but it’s an almost universal complaint among married men, said Elisabeth J. LaMotte, a couples psychotherapist and founder of the DC Counseling and Psychotherapy Center.

“Often, from the woman’s perspective, the topic feels so important that she can’t possibly sleep until things have been adequately discussed,” LaMotte explained. “But for many men, this is the least appealing time to talk. They feel like their exhaustion and need to sleep is being dismissed by their wives.” 

To curb unexpected late-night convos, LaMotte suggests carving out some time — maybe it’s 10 minutes after work or right after dinner — when spouses can give their full attention and mental energy to issues that matter.

3. She doesn’t appreciate me. 

When speaking with husbands who’ve cheated, psychotherapist and Neuman Method co-creator M. Gary Neuman said the biggest complaint usually isn’t a lackluster sex life, but rather feeling under-appreciated by their wives.

“The problem is, too many women think that if they are overly appreciative to their husbands, they’ll reduce their husband’s desire to please her. It’s quite the opposite. actually. Men are energized when they feel their wives are appreciating them,” he said.

4. She doesn’t back me up when I discipline the kids. 

To be an effective parenting team, you need to establish a genuinely united front for the kids’ sake: When dad says to take it easy on the Halloween candy, mom needs to back him up. But Berger said many husbands complain about having to go it alone on discipline. 

“They feel like there’s no backup,’ she said. “Couples really need to support each other in front of the kids and talk to each other in advance so they can agree on what disciplinary action will occur. When children know their parents disagree about what they’re allowed to do or on consequences for breaking rules, they’re likely to play one parent against the other — and that only results in stress for the couple.” 

5.  She’s not interested in sex.

Sex may not be as hot and heavy as it used to be, but for most couples, it still needs to be a priority. Neuman said that men often complain that they’re starting to feel more like roommates than spouses — their wives just don’t seem interested in sex anymore.

“The biggest complaint in the intimacy department for men is not about how satisfying sex is with their wives, but that they feel there’s simply not enough,” he said.

The solution doesn’t rest squarely on wives’ shoulders, said Neuman; husbands need to work on fostering intimacy by lending their wives some support outside the bedroom. 

“Research shows that when men split the duties of household chores and child-rearing, they have more sex,” he said. “Couples need to talk about what will make both of them happier — what each need in order to create a more intimate relationship.”

6. Our marriage is no longer a priority for her. 

In therapy sessions, men tell Berger that at some point in time, they feel like their marriage took a backseat to nearly everything else in their wives’ lives: the kids, her career, nights out with friends. To rebuild that sense of partnership, Berger tells couples to make a real effort to go on date nights once a week. 

“It should be a time to relax and daydream out loud, like when you were courting — before the responsibilities of married life kicked in!” she said. “Then also schedule marriage meetings where you work on resolving issues and fostering teamwork within your marriage.”

Date nights — along with loosely structured conversations about marriage and family responsibilities – should go a long way in bringing spouses closer together, Berger said.

More From HuffPost: 

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Dr. Phil – The Huffington Post

10 things to know about DJ and producer Calvin Harris

Calvin Harris: 10 things to know about the DJ and music producer
News, reviews, interviews and more for top artists and albums – MSN Music
ADULT ENTERTAINMENT NEWS UPDATE:Gabby Love’s top pick! Click and enjoy!

First Listen: Saintseneca, ‘Such Things’

The Ohio band spends its new album shoehorning deep, dark ideas into pocket-sized pop-rock anthems. Every word and sound feels thoughtfully wrought, but Such Things also exudes freewheeling joy.

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Rock : NPR

ADULT ENTERTAINMENT NEWS UPDATE:Click and Enjoy!

Things Not To Discuss On Your First Date

Apart from the aforementioned topics, it would also be better to abstain from initiating discussions pertaining to your previous relationships. Your first date is very special and both of you are there to enjoy with each other. Have some special food, listen to music, watch a movie and dance together. Try keeping serious discussions at bay. If you like each other, then you would definitely meet again and those discussions can wait till the next meeting. Keep discussions light, simple and interactive and both of you would enjoy your first date.
Relationships:Dating Articles from EzineArticles.com

9 Things Introverts Can Do To Make Their Weddings Less Overwhelming

Weddings can be a stressful, overwhelming time for anyone, but particularly for brides and grooms who identify as introverts. 

Why? Because typically, introverts aren’t comfortable being the center of attention. They try to avoid small talk and require quiet alone time to gain energy and recharge their batteries. This, of course, poses a big challenge during the wedding chaos: all eyes are on you, your second cousin twice removed is trying to chat your ear off and you’re surrounded by people. Constantly.

So we asked experts, wedding planners and brides to share their best tips on how introverts can stay cool, calm and collected throughout the planning process and especially on the big day. Take a deep breath and find out what they had to say below: 

1. For starters, plan a wedding that suits your personality — it can be as low-key as you want it to be. 

“Remember that the only thing that absolutely, positively must happen for a wedding to be successful is that you end up married at the end of the day,” Sophia Dembling, author of Introverts in Love: The Quiet Way to Happily Ever After, tells The Huffington Post. “So you can make your wedding anything you and your betrothed want: a quiet sunset ceremony on a beach or a small backyard family gathering. Even the frou-frou, attention-grabbing dress is optional. It’s your wedding, make it an event that will bring you true joy.” 

2. Opt to do a “first look” before the ceremony. 

“For introverted brides terrified of walking down the aisle, I recommend a first look with their partner before the ceremony,” wedding planner Tracie Domino of Tracie Domino Events says. “This private time between the two of you is incredibly sweet and allows you to experience seeing each other for the first time without all of your guests staring at you. Walking down the aisle will still be incredibly special, but you will feel like you are in it together this way.” 

3. Schedule some “you” time on the big day, so you can take a breather (or two).

“Introverts need some quiet time away from social activities, so make sure to take breaks throughout the day,” self-proclaimed introvert and founder of Intimate Weddings Christina Friedrichsen tells HuffPost. “This could mean escaping to the powder room or to a quiet place in your reception area. Having some quiet one-on-one time with your sweetie during the big day can also help you recharge.”

“And don’t feel bad about doing this,” Dembling says. “If you take little breaks, you’ll be able to keep going longer, without getting cranky.” 

4. It may sound like just one more thing on your already busy schedule, but consider planning a casual pre-wedding get-together with family and friends.

“This will sound counter-intuitive, but try to organize an event or informal gathering the day before the wedding so that you can see as many people as possible in advance,” Fusion anchor and recent bride Alicia Menendez says. “People are there to see and celebrate you and your partner, and if you maximize their opportunities to do that, it actually lowers the pressure on the big day.” 

5. Consider having a smaller bridal party. 

“Big bridal parties often lead to bigger problems,” Domino says. “From trying to find a dress that will fit everyone to one of your girls complaining that her hair appointment is too early, the less opinions the introverted bride has to deal with the better.”

“Keep your getting-ready squad as small as possible,” Menendez adds. “You’ll want and need that calm, quiet time before things really kick off.”

6. Limit the amount of input you’re getting from well-meaning friends and family — you’re the decision maker here! 

“If you involve mom and grandma and Aunt Jane and his mom and grandma and Aunt Jane too, while also getting ideas from friends and coworkers, you’ll be begging for head space before you know it,” Dr. Laurie Helgoe, psychologist and author of Introvert Power, says. “Introverts are good at listening and really thinking about what others say. When the ‘others’  become too many, there’s no room left for your own thoughts. Be selective.”

7. Skip the sweetheart table at the reception.

“Introverted brides tend to love the idea of a feasting table — where the bride and groom sit with the bridal party and their dates,” Domino recommends. “With this option, the bride and groom don’t feel as much like they are onstage and more like they are having a dinner party within the wedding reception with their closest friends.”

8. If you’re marrying an extrovert, let your partner do the talking.

“If your spouse-to-be is less introverted than you, let him or her take on more of a social role in the wedding,” Friedrichsen suggests. “This might mean he is the one that makes small talk with guests and thanks everyone for coming out. Also, your wedding attendants are great allies for fielding requests, making introductions and organizing people, which are all things introverts generally find difficult. A day-of coordinator or wedding planner can also help you deal with vendors, so you don’t have to.”

9. Make sure you have plenty of time to chill before and after the wedding. 

“Make a point of giving yourself at least a day of serious downtime before everything gets going so you can store up some energy,” Dembling says. “Then, if you don’t head out for your honeymoon right away, take another day or two after the last guest heads home to regroup and rest up. If you do leave for your honeymoon right away, try to schedule a few quiet days at the beginning to rest up before any sightseeing or other action.”

Remember: This may be the only time in your life that you will be surrounded by this many friends and family on both sides.

“Don’t fight it,” Dembling says. “Try to soak in the goodness of it. If anything is worth the effort, this is it. You can rest later.”

And who knows, it may turn out to be much easier and much more wonderful than you ever anticipated. 

“Here’s what I was not expecting,” Menendez says. “At some point, gratitude takes over and you are genuinely happy to be surrounded by so many people who you love and who love you.”

Also on HuffPost: 

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Gay Voices – The Huffington Post

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Andrew Keegan Sues — 10 Things I Hate About Websites Claiming I’m a Criminal

Actor-turned-church-leader Andrew Keegan claims his reputation is ruined over Kombucha … and he wants $ 33 mil to make it right. Keegan got some bad press after his church — Full Circle Venice —  was slapped for selling Kombucha to its…

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iHeartRadio Music Festival Day 2: 49 Things You Need to See

With the amount of A-list talent on the scene, there was no way to keep track of all the action at day two of the iHeartRadio Music Festival on…
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8 Things We Learned From Dumblonde On The Breakfast Club [Photos]

Remember Danity Kane? We sure the do. While the female R&B group is no longer, former members Aubrey and Shannon stopped by The Breakfast Club to discuss their new project and more.

As one of the premier acts to come from Making The Band, Danity Kane saw some success through their first two albums, but the girls couldn’t keep it together.

After breaking up, reuniting and breaking up again, Aubrey O’Day and Shannon Bex have started a new pop group Dumblonde.

DJ Envy, Angela Yee and Charlamagne Tha God got the ladies to discuss Diddy, D. Woods, Dawn Richards, the music industry and more.

So we present the top 8 things we learned from the Dumblonde The Breakfast Club interview. Are you surprised Danity Kane made so little money? Sound off in the comments section.


Photo: Power 105FM/Youtube

The post 8 Things We Learned From Dumblonde On The Breakfast Club [Photos] appeared first on Hip-Hop Wired.

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‘Playing House’ stars share their favorite things with KLG, Hoda

Jessica St. Clair and Lennon Parham of “Playing House” share their favorite things with Kathie Lee and Hoda. Jessica chooses the book “The 5 Love Languages” and Lennon picks a cleanser from Jady Aesthetics.


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16 Things Women Wish Men Would Do On Dates

Dating after divorce is a scary, scary prospect. Between crotch shots from random dudes on Tinder to rants about ex-wives on dates, is it any wonder that so many of us throw in the towel and say “thanks, but no thanks” to getting back out there? 

It’s time to raise the bar, gentlemen. To that end, we asked our readers on HuffPost Divorce’s Facebook page to share the one thing they wish more men would do before, during and after dates.

Read what they had to say below: 

1. ”Be ready to talk and don’t ask ‘where is this heading?'” – Denise Robinson

2. “Dating is nerve-wracking! I wish guys would admit that they’re a wreck, too. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one sweating.” — Kasey Ferris

3. “Don’t talk about your sex life — or lack thereof — on the first date.” — Lori Shively

 

4. “Let me pick up the check sometimes. My first date with my now ex-husband was a pleasant surprise; he wouldn’t let me pay for my dinner but he let me buy us both coffee afterward. It felt like he saw me more as an equal than someone he was expected to take care of.” — Kate Fruehling

 

5. “Be honest about who you are and what type of relationship you’re looking for and are capable of having.” — Vicki Richards

 

6. “Hold doors open for me. Pull out my chair!” — Amy Mudd

 

7. “Don’t examine the bill when you get it. I already feel bad enough that you’re paying, let’s not make it awkward too.” – Renee Hamilton

 

8. “Candy Crush can wait. Just sayin.'” – Kimberly McGrain

9. “Please, no d*ck pics beforehand.” — Kelly Connolly 

10. ”Be yourself and have no ulterior motives. Just enjoy the encounter with another human being, without hidden agendas or stupid games.” — Ana Nita 

11. “Don’t discuss your negative opinions about monogamy. So many divorced men have this anti-relationship mindset and love to vocalize it. It may be because they aren’t taking enough time to heal from their breakup. Whatever the case may be, asking me out and then slamming the idea of relationships is unsexy and probably won’t get you a second date. (Or laid, if that’s what you’re after.)” — Kimberly McGrain 

12. “Listen to my response after you ask a question. Make real conversation with lots of give and take. Good conversation is the best.” — Kate Winter Davis 

13. ”Appreciate the date. Single men in their 40s act like women have to accept scraps. As if they’re our last hope, saving us from a life of spinsterhood!” — Kathi Williams Robinson

 

14. “Ask us out on a date. I don’t want to ‘hang out’ or ‘chill.’ I’m a grown woman.” – Heidi Beale

15. ”On the date, treat us like a priority, not just an option.” — Amy Kuniholm

 

16. “During the date, refrain from saying,  ’I’m better at being single than in a relationship… So do you want to go out again?'” — Janice Songer 

 

Also on HuffPost: 
 

 

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.




Divorce – The Huffington Post

Need to File for a Divorce!

Terrence Howard’s Bizarre Terryology Theory and 11 More Revealing Things About the Empire Star

Terrence Howard's recent interview with Rolling Stone is gaining lots of buzz for being, well, kind of strange. (Although, this certainly isn't the first time an actor's given an eyebrow-raising interview, nor will it be…


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16 Things Women Wish Men Would Do On Dates

Dating after divorce is a scary, scary prospect. Between crotch shots from random dudes on Tinder to rants about ex-wives on dates, is it any wonder that so many of us throw in the towel and say “thanks, but no thanks” to getting back out there? 

It’s time to raise the bar, gentlemen. To that end, we asked our readers on HuffPost Divorce’s Facebook page to share the one thing they wish more men would do before, during and after dates.

Read what they had to say below: 

1. ”Be ready to talk and don’t ask ‘where is this heading?'” – Denise Robinson

2. “Dating is nerve-wracking! I wish guys would admit that they’re a wreck, too. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one sweating.” — Kasey Ferris

3. “Don’t talk about your sex life — or lack thereof — on the first date.” — Lori Shively

 

4. “Let me pick up the check sometimes. My first date with my now ex-husband was a pleasant surprise; he wouldn’t let me pay for my dinner but he let me buy us both coffee afterward. It felt like he saw me more as an equal than someone he was expected to take care of.” — Kate Fruehling

 

5. “Be honest about who you are and what type of relationship you’re looking for and are capable of having.” — Vicki Richards

 

6. “Hold doors open for me. Pull out my chair!” — Amy Mudd

 

7. “Don’t examine the bill when you get it. I already feel bad enough that you’re paying, let’s not make it awkward too.” – Renee Hamilton

 

8. “Candy Crush can wait. Just sayin.'” – Kimberly McGrain

9. “Please, no d*ck pics beforehand.” — Kelly Connolly 

10. ”Be yourself and have no ulterior motives. Just enjoy the encounter with another human being, without hidden agendas or stupid games.” — Ana Nita 

11. “Don’t discuss your negative opinions about monogamy. So many divorced men have this anti-relationship mindset and love to vocalize it. It may be because they aren’t taking enough time to heal from their breakup. Whatever the case may be, asking me out and then slamming the idea of relationships is unsexy and probably won’t get you a second date. (Or laid, if that’s what you’re after.)” — Kimberly McGrain 

12. “Listen to my response after you ask a question. Make real conversation with lots of give and take. Good conversation is the best.” — Kate Winter Davis 

13. ”Appreciate the date. Single men in their 40s act like women have to accept scraps. As if they’re our last hope, saving us from a life of spinsterhood!” — Kathi Williams Robinson

 

14. “Ask us out on a date. I don’t want to ‘hang out’ or ‘chill.’ I’m a grown woman.” – Heidi Beale

15. ”On the date, treat us like a priority, not just an option.” — Amy Kuniholm

 

16. “During the date, refrain from saying,  ’I’m better at being single than in a relationship… So do you want to go out again?'” — Janice Songer 

 

Also on HuffPost: 
 

 

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.




Comedy – The Huffington Post
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Vanessa Williams — Apology Accepted … Miss America Smooths Things Over

[[tmz:video id=”0_5mpuxlav”]] Vanessa Williams and the Miss America Pageant just kissed and made up, more than 30 years after Williams was forced to hand over her crown. The show opened Sunday night with Miss America CEO Sam Haskell apologizing to…

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News in Brief: Horrifying Email From Ex-Girlfriend Titled ‘A Few Things’

OXNARD, CA—His heart pounding in fear as he stared at the unread message in his inbox, area man Joe Dubbin reportedly checked Gmail at 11 p.m. Sunday night to discover a horrifying email from his ex-girlfriend titled simply “A few things.” “Oh, God,” Dubbin said under his breath as he worked up the nerve to move his cursor over the wholly unexpected message, a film of cold sweat materializing on his brow as he scanned the previewed line of text that read “Just so you know” followed by an ellipsis. “Should I just open this thing and get it over with now, or maybe mark it as ‘read’ and look at it tomorrow? Or I could just delete it quickly and forget this ever happened. Jesus.” Sources reported that Dubbin’s pupils then dilated in terror when, 12 minutes after the email arrived in his inbox, the number …




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4 Things That Have Happened Since Nicole Arbour’s Fat-Shaming Video Went Viral

Earlier this week, we wrote about comedian Nicole Arbour's offensive "Dear Fat People" video. The video is now up to 3,588,585 views (and counting), and everyone from celebrities to fellow YouTubers have spoken out about…


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9 Things You Must See From the Givenchy Spring 2016 Show

We all knew the Givenchy show was going to be incredbile the moment we heard that creative director Riccardo Tisci was moving the runway from Paris to New York and giving 820 tickets to people…


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The 9 Best Internet Things Of All Time Of The Week

The 9 Best Internet Things Of All Time Of The Week

The 9 Best Internet Things Of All Tim…
This week’s best internet things include Jayhawks and Tigers and Chewbacca! Oh My!
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Things Single Girls Say

We’ve all been there before: sprawled on the couch in pajamas, a pint of Ben & Jerry’s in one hand and a glass of Moscato in the other, binge-watching our favorite show on Netflix. There’s a pound of assorted chocolates on the coffee table in front of you and your best friend is likely on her way to help keep you from gaining 10 pounds or worse… picking up your phone to call him. That’s right, we’ve all been single before. And we seem to know a lot about it. Whether you’re just recovering from a tough breakup, or have been owning the single life for quite some time, there are universal things single girls say. Here are the top seven:

“Can you put some Beyonce on next?”
Beyonce is pretty much the audio-medicine for a breakup. If you’re single and not listening to Beyonce, there’s something wrong.

“Will there be any hot guys?”
AKA: do I need to straighten my hair? Spend an extra 10 minutes on getting my eyeliner perfect? Is it even worth getting out of my pajamas to go? I mean, you’re single; you need to know these things ahead of time.

“I’m glad I’m single ’cause…”
There are plenty of reasons why being single rocks. You have time to invest in yourself and self-indulge. You have complete freedom. You don’t have to worry about Christmas or birthday gifts. When you’re single, be glad you’re single.

“Ooh he’s hot.”
When you’re single and ready to mingle, you’re on the lookout for a hottie. Always. At the bus stop. The Whole Foods line. The coffee shop. Even at the Doctor’s Surgery. And when you’re out with your wing-woman, of course you need a code for a good sighting. So, when I touch my nose, it means he’s hot. Got it?

“Girls Niiiiight.”
Obviously best yelled en masse. Who doesn’t need a girls night complete with facial masks, white wine, and every. single. Ryan Gosling movie produced.

“I saw the hottest guy on Tinder.”
Tinder is one of those things we love to hate. But really, it’s just like any other dating field out there: you gotta search through the rubbish to find a gem worth keeping.

“Screw him.”
No matter if your relationship ended on a decent note, or if he was a complete jerk who screwed you over, you’re not with him anymore so… screw him. Trust us, you’re better off without him.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.




Comedy – The Huffington Post
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7 Things My Divorce Taught Me About Life, Love and Marriage

2015-09-04-1441370616-2663911-ForkRoad.jpg

At the start of 2014, my life imploded. After countless efforts to work through issues in my marriage, I finally had to admit: I wasn’t going to have my happily-ever-after in my present situation. I left my marriage, my home, and one of my dogs. (If you consider that the ex also kept the truck, my life was a country song.) I knew I was doing the right thing for both of us, but I was blindsided by how much — and for how long — it hurt. Slowly, I healed, and I learned invaluable lessons.

1.  Opposites attract. But you need real common ground to stick together.

My ex-husband and I were a classic case of opposites attracting. I’m liberal. He’s conservative. I’m a whirlwind of athletic activity. He might run to the fridge for a beer. Initially, we enjoyed our differences. And yeah, there was the SEX. We could’ve made Sting and Trudie say, “No, thanks. That sounds exhausting.” Trouble is, you can’t spend your entire life in bed. When it came to the big stuff — money, work, family — we simply weren’t on the same page. Worse, we couldn’t discuss how to get there.

2.  Communication is key.

When you’re dealing with pretty much anyone, communicating openly and respectfully is key. In marriage, it’s essential. Psychologist John Gottman has made a career of studying how married couples interact. After listening to a couple argue for only five minutes, he can predict with 91% accuracy whether or not they will divorce. He’s found that partners who disengage (i.e., give “the silent treatment”) or treat one another with contempt (eye rolling) are in a marriage that is doomed. Sadly, I can vouch for this.

3.  Happiness is your own responsibility.

Too often, we marry because we’ve bought into a romantic fallacy: that someone else will “complete” us. Here’s the unvarnished truth: if you aren’t already complete, you’ve got no business getting married. Me? I was waiting for Prince Charming to sweep me off my feet. He did — and then he was slowly crushed by the weight of the responsibility. The brutal irony was that when I found my own bliss, it underscored how incompatible he and I were. But in parting, we each assumed responsibility for our own happiness. Whether we are sad or happy going forward, at least now we each have only the person in the mirror to blame — or to thank.

4.  We are all alone.

I don’t mean that in a depressing, soul-crushing way. Quite the contrary. We are born alone. We die alone. In between, though? It is our relationships with other people that make the journey worthwhile. Some people pass through our lives quickly. Others stay for the duration. We generally accept this where friendships are concerned. But because we say “forever” when we say “I do,” we think marriage should be an exception to the rule. In the end, though, even those of us who stay married will likely exit this life on our own. What really matters? The love we share in the time we spend together — and how graciously we manage to move on from those relationships that don’t last.

5.  A failed marriage isn’t necessarily a failure.

Look, if you hook up on Tinder, get married in Vegas that same weekend, and then your marriage fails — well okay, that’s a failure. But if you follow the typical trajectory of romance, love and commitment only to find yourself divorced down the road? That’s life. Love may lead us to the altar, but marriage requires two devoted people working ceaselessly toward common goals. For many once-happy couples, that becomes impossible over time. If we can look realistically at the reasons our marriage failed, we can gain valuable insight that will lead to happier relationships in the future. In the words of Winston Churchill, “Failure is not fatal; it is the courage to continue that counts.”

6.  Tomorrow is another day.

I thought the hardest part of my divorce would be arriving at the decision to leave my marriage. Ha! This positive go-getter of a girl spent several months occupying her bachelorette pad in pajamas, watching reruns of Law and Order and washing down frozen yogurt with chardonnay. I was a mess, and not even the hot variety (as the local pizza-delivery folks can attest). I beat myself up for handling things so poorly. And then, one day, I gave myself permission to grieve. With the help of an excellent therapist, I began to focus on the road ahead. I decided I could take things one day at a time, and eventually, I would find myself where I want to be.  And you know what?

7.  Here and now is pretty awesome.

At the start of 2014, I was heavily focused on my losses. I missed my home, my dog, the ex, and even that old pickup truck in which we’d logged so many miles and memories. Turns out, though, that time really does heal all wounds. Slowly but surely, I found myself savoring moments in my new solo life. I found myself trying new things, building new friendships, even giving dating a whirl and meeting some really great people in the process.

More than midway through 2015, I feel happy. Grateful. Excited about the future, and also just plain glad to breathe deeply and experience it all.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.




Divorce – The Huffington Post

Need to File for a Divorce!

9 Things We Learned From Damon Wayans On The Breakfast Club [Photos]

Damon Wayans is a one of a kind for many reasons. The comedian stopped by The Breakfast Club to give his insight on pop culture, television and more.

Known for his contributions to In Living Color, Damon has been funny before and after the legendary show.

DJ Envy, Angela Yee and Charlamagne Tha God got him to discuss his stint on Saturday Night Live, social media, the Wayans family, Bill Cosby and more.

So we present the top 10 things we learned from Damon Wayans on The Breakfast Club. Do you agree with him wanting to get fired from NBC? Sound off below.

Photo: Power 105FM / Youtube

The post 9 Things We Learned From Damon Wayans On The Breakfast Club [Photos] appeared first on Hip-Hop Wired.

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Justin Bieber Just Added Climbing Really Tall Things To His Résumé

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The 10 Best Things I Did Before My Divorce

A friend said to me that I made getting divorced look easy. I suppose when you’re ready, it can be! I was so ready that in fact it only took three months from start to finish. It could have been less, but I opted for a later court date because I hadn’t expected it to go so smoothly. Another factor is when you don’t have a lot of “stuff,” meaning money and material possessions, there’s not much to argue over. Keeping the focus on the children and not your ego is the best path to freedom. Here’s how I did it:

1. I quit my job and started working from home.
I actually did this over four years ago, but it was the most liberating, challenging thing I’d done in my marriage. Granted I have an entrepreneurial streak, or in the latest vernacular “solopreneurial,” but it still takes a great deal of courage to risk financial hardship and incredible strength to carry through with a vision and make money. With these skills, I had the confidence to do anything.

2. I went to a divorce lawyer, twice, two years apart.
The first visit was shortly after I quit my job. I had zero support from my co-parent. He had no idea what it was I had set out to accomplish, and felt terribly burdened with having to support the family 100%. I can’t blame him for that, but I had a plan, he just didn’t understand it. For all he knew I had turned into an Internet junkie and was surfing porn sites. A little support would have gone a long way… I learned from my first visit that I had a tough road ahead of me if I were to leave the marriage. There just wasn’t enough money and the children would suffer. So I waited. Last year, I went again, and the numbers came out much better. And on the plus side, because in reality there still wasn’t any money to fight over, both visits were pro bono. I never got a bill.

3. I started working out regularly, including taking up running.
It was not my first intent to look better. I was more concerned about feeling better. I was sitting all day and not moving around as much, so my lower back hurt, my hips cracked all the time, and my legs were cramping. As I started to feel better, I noticed my mood improved immensely too. I had more energy, I slept better, and I looked better. And going to the gym is social, which I needed just as much. And for whatever reason, I decided to start running. I don’t know why I had waited so long. I loved it immediately (well, after the third time.) It was the biggest physical challenge I had taken on yet. Running has changed my life. I know that I’m in the best shape I’ve ever been in, which gives me confidence in everything I do.

4. I saw more of my friends.
Girls night took on new importance. As did traveling to meet up with my far away friends. I have a fantastic core group of friends in my area and we meet at least twice a month and I know I can count on them for anything. I know a lot of people in my town, but I am blessed to have my small group. And then there are the friends I’ve collected over time and know we can continue the conversation whenever we want. Doubly blessed. These are the people who you contact first with the good news and who get you through the heartache. They’re also the people that, say for example you find out Pearl Jam is playing in San Diego and want to go, you text them with your request and the next thing you know you’re flying to San Diego from the east coast to see Pearl Jam. Pretty amazing.

5. I kept up with my journal.
Writing in my journal has saved my life. Who else would want to hear my rambles every day? I’ve been keeping a journal on and off since college. I’ve found that I used to only write during the bad times. I have a lot of journals under my bed! Now I write habitually everyday. On my laptop, password protected. There are so many benefits I can’t possibly begin to list. But one that comes to mind, now that I’m on my laptop, is when I start to question something, after I focus on my feelings I can then google it and find out more. The answers are readily available, if I ask the right questions of course. Otherwise I could keep on writing in circles…

6. I read everything I could get my hands on about relationships from start to end.
This carries over from keeping a journal, but everything you need to know is right at your fingertips. The internet is amazing. There’s a lot of advice out there, good and bad. I fished through and found all sorts of great resources to help me grow, understand, connect with myself, and find the tools to start again. Ask the right question and you will see for yourself!

7. I forgave my parents.
Not as easy as it sounds. But it was the one big thing holding me back. I admit, I’m not 100%, but I’m much better than I was before. I’m just happy to be free of holding that grudge and they are, after all, just people. No one is perfect. Their lives weren’t really that great and now in their old age they’re suffering enough. It’s liberating to just let it go.

8. I forgave my co-parent.
I can’t blame him. I didn’t ask the right questions when I met him and I assumed way too much. He was just along for the ride. Had I been wiser, I would have seen that. I’ve now learned that relationships are a learning process and they take more work than I would have ever known. Had I been smarter I would have known that he wasn’t the one to go on the journey with me. And having realized that, I was able to sincerely apologize to him for whatever it was he was feeling and to ask forgiveness. He’s not quite there yet but one day he will be.

9. I forgave myself.
Oh the mistakes I’ve made! So many! But I can’t beat myself up. I didn’t have the tools. I didn’t have the foundation. I didn’t have any role models. I just didn’t know. At every turn I truly believe I did the best with what I had at the time. It’s as simple as that. I’m blessed in that I’m able to make the most of a situation and learn from it. And at the very least I know that no matter how bad it seems, it always gets better. It does. A friend said to me ages ago, “Crisis is opportunity.” I’ve had plenty of that!

10. I made it all about my two boys.
My problems are not theirs. Their world is their challenge. It’s enough for them to prioritize brushing their teeth before bed and getting dressed in the morning. The greatest benefit of being self employed and knowing how to live on virtually nothing is that I have the time to process my problems when alone and then focus on them when we’re together. Our stress is, most of the time anyway, about what raising two boys brings – meal times, homework, after school activities, girls, friends, screen time. And please put your dirty dishes directly into the dishwasher. These are good problems. My co-parent is their other parent and it is my duty to be respectful of that. I do whatever it takes to keep the spin positive. Because it’s not always easy. Would I like to make more money and enjoy more luxuries? Yes! But right now that’s not a priority. They’re still young and I’m not comfortable creating any more change in their life. When the time comes, I’ll know. We’ve made it this far.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.




Divorce – The Huffington Post

Need to File for a Divorce!

Miley Cyrus Says Nicki Minaj Was ”Not Very Polite” During Video Music Awards Outburst—Plus, 7 More Things We Learned

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Things That Can’t Be Undone – Corb Lund

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Things That Can’t Be Undone

Corb Lund

Genre: Country

Price: $ 9.99

Expected Release Date: October 9, 2015

© ℗ 2015 New West Records, LLC

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This Foolproof Guide Will Help You Get Out Of Things You Don’t Want To Go To

It begins innocently enough.

Your neighbor casually mentions an upcoming BBQ and you respond that it sounds like fun. The conversation turns to golf or harpoon guns or something else banal and you forget about the BBQ. Next thing you know, your family is responsible for bringing the potato salad to an all-day birthday party in a park across town. At the same time as the Niners game. And it’s the playoffs. And you hate potato salad.

We’ve all found ourselves committed to social events that either sounded like a good idea at the time but something came up, or that we were roped into against our conscious will. Bound by merciless societal norms, backing out sans excuse isn’t an option.

To help the over-committed un-commit gracefully, we’ve partnered with US Cellular to bring you a step-by-step guide to smoothly getting out of an undesirable party, shower, or event. To avoid awkward run-ins with the host in the future, read carefully and don’t skip a step:

1. Display Genuine Regret

First and foremost, you have to convey how unfortunate it is that you won’t be able to make it. The whole plan will fall apart if you don’t sell your regret. It reassures the host that you’re only skipping out because of unforeseen, uncontrollable outside factors. If you’re having a hard time with the delivery, channel your inner Ryan O’Neill or Tom Hanks (and not so much your Space Odyssey HAL).

2. Finely Tuned Excuse

A good excuse should be specific, but not too specific. Specific enough that it seems credible, but not so overly detailed that it feels forced. Illness is fine, but it’s tougher to give advance notice of an illness and you don’t want to inconvenience the party thrower unnecessarily. Instead, stick to events that came up without warning that take precedence for an obvious reason, like work-related projects or business trips. If necessary, you can also use family members as an out — blame it on the spouse or kids.

3. Pledge Future Commitment

This one is tricky because you don’t want to land yourself in the same predicament. Nevertheless, showing an interest in future plans reinforces step #1 and can often allow you to take the initiative. If your neighbor always throws BBQs on game day, you can propose something that fits your schedule better. If it doesn’t work out, it becomes more of a mutually unfortunate thing than just you being reticent.

4. Follow-up

The follow-up is key. Repeat steps #1 and #3 (not step #2 — remember, no over-selling), and reinforce the fact that you were genuinely interested. A simple text asking how it went usually works best.

5. Don’t Screw It Up

If you had to back out of the commitment for a less than savory reason (not everyone thinks football is as important as you), you want to make absolute sure you don’t screw it up by Tweeting “Touchdown” 10 minutes into the BBQ when you’re supposed to be at your spouse’s work function. Your digital trail is more closely watched than you probably realize. It also helps to have support from your family which brings us to…

6. Rehearse Alibi With Family

Your kids go to school together, your spouses go to the same gym, and you know people who know the same people. To make sure you don’t reveal conflicting stories, it might be helpful to rehearse the established alibi with the family.

7. Revel In Your Guilt-Free Freedom

Look, at the end of the day, the fact is that time is precious. Don’t spend your life doing things you don’t want to do. We all have to face uncomfortable social situations from time to time, so it’s best to do so with a plan. A well-crafted strategy will let you enjoy your activity of choice with peace of mind and ensure that you aren’t burning bridges or hurting anyone’s feelings. If you executed said plan well, make sure you enjoy the moment.

Many people are stuck with a decision they made — whether intentionally or unintentionally — in the past, but U.S. Cellular is offering an opportunity to walk away from your wireless ones. Switch to U.S. Cellular, get a better price, and get your entire existing contract paid off.

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10 Things You Should Never Do After Discovering A Spouse’s Affair

From Michela for DivorcedMoms.com

There is nothing so terrifying in a married woman’s life than the threat of an unfaithful spouse. Why? Well, most everything else we can handle; losing a job, losing a parent, the sickness of a child or relative. All of those things can be “fixed”; they have solutions that we can band together with our spouse to overcome.

But an affair is the relationship equivalent of pouring Roundup on fresh, green grass; it kills everything around it. If you’re unfortunate enough to be faced with this situation, there are things you should do…but more importantly, things you shouldn’t. Chin up, sweetheart. We’re going to get through this together.

1. Don’t fall apart. Easier said than done. When my ex told me (on New Year’s Eve, of all times) that he “thought” he was in love with someone else, my first thought was, “Oh snap, there’s not enough alcohol in the house for this crisis.” My second thought was to fall apart; cry, wail and scream until he felt as bad as I did in that moment. And as tempting as those are: don’t. Instead, take a breath and repeat after me: This will not define me. And believe me, it won’t.

2. Don’t start a mud-slinging campaign. It’s so tempting to start calling every single friend you two have to dump on what your ex is doing to your life of bliss. The danger in this is that — by doing it — you make yourself look really, really bad. Close friends and family that you KNOW is different, but beyond your small circle, resist the urge unless you want to come out looking like the “soon-to-be evil ex”.

3. Don’t get destructive. Oh, sure, it’s all fun and games until you “accidentally” shatter the front to his commemorative window box with a football signed by what’s-his-name. Any damage you do to the property in your home — regardless of whether it’s “yours” or “his” — will have financial consequences for you later. So put that Sharpie down and don’t ask your bestie if three-four letter words need a hyphen or not. Just. Say. No.

4. Don’t involve the kids until you absolutely have to. Your kids are the audience to this mess; they have front row tickets to the show and you don’t want to give them any more fodder for their future therapists than you have to, so keep it between you and your ex until you absolutely must tell them what’s going on. And only the bare facts, if possible. Sorry, but a backhanded explanation of, “Sorry honey, daddy isn’t here now because he’s hanging out with his new friend with the fake breasts and letting mommy hold the bag of all our broken dreams” isn’t going to win you any points in the long run. Keep it clean, ladies.

5. Don’t play “keeping up with the Joneses”. Many of my girlfriends did this game and it never ended well. He gets a new car, you get a Mercedes. He got a girlfriend who is five years younger, you’re dating someone ten years your junior. He takes the kids to the zoo, you fly them to Disneyland. The kids don’t understand what’s going on, and even if they do, there are no winners and the ante will always go up until it gets really nasty and you’re explaining to the judge why you bribed Cirque du Soleil performers to come to your five-year-old’s birthday “bash”. No.

6. Don’t be the victim. Very few things anger me more than the girl who plays the victim after she’s been cheated on. What I’m referring to is the “Oh, I probably deserved it” mentality. You did nothing to “deserve” this. I don’t care if you did everything in your marriage from burning his dinner to ogling the pool boy as he changed the filter. There is NO excuse for cheating. None. The minute you begin to feel as though “this is what you get” for marrying a man who’s nickname in college was “hot dog,” you’re playing the victim. Just. Stop.

7. Don’t make it physical. No matter how much you desperately want (and he likely deserves) to have the crap beaten out of him, resist that urge. Trust me when I say, even a good hard (okay, partially satisfying) slap on his face isn’t going to feel as good as you think it will. This is the person who has betrayed you in the most basic sense of the word. He has shattered your heart, but his shattered jaw is NOT going to make your heart whole again. Believe me when I say, paying a man named “Jimmy-the-Fist” is not going to help the situation any. If you must punch something, take a boxing class.

8. Don’t go all out Kardashian. Now before you reality-addicts start bashing me for this, here is what I mean; wearing clothes that look like you’re doing a porn film, ACTUALLY doing an online video exposing your private bits, flirting with pretty much anyone and everyone for attention and blasting the private deets of this drama online. Yes, this means you, Queen-of-Tweeting how stupid he looked in that dumb tie he bought last Christmas. Keep it classy.

9. If he’s in a relationship with the person he cheated on you with, don’t treat her like yesterday’s trash. This is going to be the hardest one to do in real life because our egos are bruised. She is the reason our “happily-ever-after” didn’t happen! Unfortunately, though, it DID happen, and you focusing your energy on slamming doors in her face when she shows up with him to pick up the kids is not going to make anything better. I’m not saying you have to schedule a mani/pedi day with her; I’m saying take the high road and tell yourself that the real reason your happily-ever-after didn’t happen isn’t just her — it’s him.

10. Don’t think your life is “over” because it’s not. This is a chance for you to start again (scary as that might seem). Your story — the new one you’re living — has the chance for another happy ending. Yes, a different one than you imagined, but you never know — it could be better than the first.

More from DivorcedMoms.com

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10 Things We Learned From Post Malone On The Breakfast Club [Photos]

Newcomer Post Malone is poised to be Hip-Hop’s next breakout star.The “White Iverson” rapper stopped by The Breakfast Club for his formal introduction.

After a noteworthy run as an independent artist, Malone seems to have the industry’s eyes and ears. He knows that his time is now and can’t afford any missteps.

DJ Envy and Charlamagne Tha God got Post to discuss his come up, being white, staying faithful to wifey and the Black Lives Matter movement.

So we present the top 10 things we learned from Post Malone on The Breakfast Club. Were you disappointed to hear his explanation on his name? Sound off below.

Photo: Power 105FM / Youtube

The post 10 Things We Learned From Post Malone On The Breakfast Club [Photos] appeared first on Hip-Hop Wired.

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Eight Things We Remember From Afropunk Fest 15

Deep in the borough of Brooklyn, New York, Afropunk was in full effect. The the festival a place where several stars like Grace Jones, Kelis, and Lenny Kravitz blessed the stage in their own extraordinary fashion. But, Afropunk was also another successful year where the culture flourished in multiple forms. There were also a couple situations throughout the two days that we kind of had to take in. This is why we want to give you the eight big factors that we remember from this year’s Afropunk Fest.

Kelis performed pregnant

Before she came out on stage, nobody expected Kelis to be pregnant and performing at Afropunk Festival. There was nothing but hype surrounding her mid-day set, but that hype had soon turned to shock and awe in a positive way. Kelis may have been pregnant, but she knew how to keep the crowd entertained all throughout her performance. Even hitting a couple of high notes to let fans know she wasn’t playing.

Instagram Photo

Lauryn Hill continued to perform after two attempts to stop her

Many concert-goers weren’t surprised about Lauryn Hill coming late to Afropunk Fest. She has proudly earned a track record of coming to the stage really late and still performing like nothing ever happened. The legendary singer was late, however, she still made an attempt to perform for fans after management tried to stop her twice. First, the sound and miss were cut off, then the house lights. Even through these two stoppages, Hill continued to keep the momentum going for the crowd.

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Danny Brown brought out Ab – Soul to perform “Terrorist Threats”

While people were waiting for Lauryn Hill to take the main stage, others were at the Red Stage watching Danny Brown turn up to his musical catalogue. The Detroit rapper brought out Ab Soul to perform their believed collaborative single “Terrorist Threats”. The crowd was amped about the surprise appearance, and went all out to remember the song’s words.

Afropunk Fest flourishes in street style once again

One thing that Afropunk Fest has always been known for is the street style of the festival. This year, the fashion statement at the festival was kicked up to a top notch once again. Afropunk is the place where you’ll find some of the most remarkable outfits from concert goers.

Click to view slideshow.

Art had a big influence on the festival this year

Whether people were seeing paint on walls or people’s faces, Afropunk Fest had a huge art influence this year. Several graffiti artists had made the environment a huge canvas to be creative on. Beautiful masterpieces were made and looks like it’ll stay there for a while.

Click to view slideshow.

Grace Jones’ set was oddly beautiful.

If you have seen Grace Jones in anything before, then you know that her style of life is not for the weak of heart. That doesn’t stop her shows from being dope, or controversial. During her performance at Afropunk Festival, Jones performed topless and also brings a couple of dancers out with her. She also managed to switch in-and-out of odd outfits each song throughout her set. Grace Jones also performed over the synths from LL Cool J’s hit “Doin It”.

Instagram Photo

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Most of Sunday’s lineup had standout performances at Afropunk

If you happen to come a little earlier to the festival, you came across some very good performances from artists on both stages. It all started with DC-native soul duo Oshun, who had mixed both their catalogue with a Go-Go music bounce near the end of their set. Jesse Boykins III then had a explosively smooth performance on the opposite stage. Following those performances was guitar player Thundercat, Raury, and Goldlink. All of the performances kept people on the move between both stages the entire day.

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The DJ’s closed Afropunk the right way

Lenny Kravits had a stellar performance on the main stage last night, but Soulection and Kaytranada were the two that had people dancing out of Afropunk. Soulection producer Lakim held the DJ stage down with several self-produced beats and music inspired by The Sound of Tomorrow, while Kaytranada was mixing up his catalogue with different tracks from the past to now. These two acts has wave of people moving to end the festival right.

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These were our best eight moments from this year’s Afropunk. What’s yours? Leave a comment or let us know on twitter via @Allhiphopcom

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Filed under: Features Tagged: Adrienne Bosh, Afropunk, fashion, feature, Grace Jones, Kaytranada, Lakim, Oshun, recap, Soulection, Street Style
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Billboard Hot 100 Fest: Unforgettable Moments & Things You May Have Missed

From the moment the first artist hit the stage to the fireworks finale on Sunday evening, Billboard’s inaugural Hot 100 Music Festival featured…
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5 Things You Didn’t Know About Emily Ratajkowski

emily ratajkowski

Since she appeared in Robin Thicke’s eyebrow-raising music video for “Blurred Lines,” people cannot get enough of Emily Ratajkowski. (And it’s easy to see why.) Now she’s transitioning from coquettish cover girl to leading lady with the upcoming DJ drama We Are Your Friends, starring opposite Zac Efron. To mark the occasion, we took a break from compulsively scrolling through the EmRata’s Instagram and did a little digging about the model turned actress. Here, five things you never knew about Emily Ratajkowski.

1. Ratajkowski’s parents were reluctant to let her start modeling at a young age, saying they didn’t want a child-star model. Modeling scouts continued to pursue Ratajkowski into her teen years. “My mom would snap back, ‘She’s going to be a brain surgeon,’ ” she once told the New York Times. At the age of fourteen, she was signed by Ford.

2. Her first acting job was in 2009, when she appeared in a small role on iCarly. “I didn’t grow up with TV, so I didn’t even know what the show was when I auditioned. I only did two episodes, so I was just on set about two weeks.”

3. Her 2011 cover for the erotica magazine Treats, which featured a nude, black-and-white portrait of Ratajkowski hugging her knees into her chest, would launch her career. Robin Thicke saw the pictorial and then showed his video director, Diane Martel, who then contacted her agent about appearing in “Blurred Lines.”

4. Ratajkowski, not wanting to get pigeonholed in the music-video world (she appeared in Maroon 5’s “Love Somebody,” and in “Fast Car” by Taio Cruz), initially declined to appear in “Blurred Lines.” She was later persuaded after hearing Martel’s playful vision for the video. As for the ensuing criticism, Ratajkowski felt it gave her “an opportunity to say the things that I felt about feminism today and about women in general in pop culture.”

5. Having grown up in a progressive household, Ratajkowski is very comfortable with nudity, and is unafraid of baring it all for the camera—especially for a compelling role. “I’m not worried about nudity,” she has told the New York Times. “I’d rather play a complex character who has a love scene than a stupid girl who’s just a girl next door.”

 

Photo: Courtesy of Emily Ratajkowski / @emrata

The post 5 Things You Didn’t Know About Emily Ratajkowski appeared first on Vogue.

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Lily Allen and Sam ‘working things out’

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Jordin Sparks: 10 things you didn’t know

Six years and one messy breakup later, Jordin Sparks is finally back with new music. The Double Tap singer made headlines last fall when she split from boyfriend of three years, pop star Jason Derulo, but has since channeled that experience into third album Right Here Right Now (out Friday), her first since 2009. "I feel like I'm coming into my own with the music and as a woman," Sparks, 25, says. "It really applies to my life and everything that's happened this past year, so it just makes a lot of sense." Here are ten things we learned chatting with the American Idol alum: 1. She's a baking pro. "In my family, I make the best cupcakes, because I just love to mess around with different flavors. But I also really love to make breakfast, like eggs and burritos and sandwiches." 2. And a coding novice. "I have an app on my phone called Swifty. My manager turned me on to it and it teaches you HTML and coding for computers, because that's really interesting. I also have Japanese language apps, because that would be really cool to learn eventually." 3. She was super disappointed in … Minions? "It makes me really sad to say this, because I'm such a kid at heart. I actually walked out of it! I just didn't get it. Maybe I wasn't in the right mindset or maybe there weren't enough people in the theater laughing along, but it just didn't do it for me. I love Despicable Me, though." 4. Big Sean's I Don't F— With You is great for breakups. "I love the chorus: It's very simple, but it means a lot. You can put a lot of emotion behind that. If somebody's going through a breakup and they need to sing or yell something at the top of their lungs, that is the song to play." 5. She's now reading vampire novel Prince Lestat by Anne Rice. "I just started, I'm on like Chapter 4, so I've barely made a dent. But I do really like it so far, I love the way she describes everything. I like fantasy stuff and science fiction books a lot." 6. Her biggest fears are moths and the ocean. "It's just weird — there shouldn't be bugs that are fluffy and fuzzy, they just gross me out. And I'm very scared of ocean water, it scares me to death that I can't see what's under me. Like, have you seen what's at the bottom of the ocean? I can look at it, but I don't want to be in it." 7. You'll always find matches in her purse. "I have a lot, actually. I like to collect matches from different places, like restaurants and stuff. I have like five of them from Zumanity, the Cirque du Soleil show." 8. 'N Sync was her very first concert. "I was in fifth grade, and I went with my friend Melissa, and Pink and Sisqó opened for them. It was so crazy, I remember being in the balcony screaming my head off for 'N Sync and then the confetti fell, and I caught some. My friend gave me this little picture frame that had my ticket, a picture of 'N Sync and some of the confetti in there. I still have it." 9. She's never tardy to the party. "I hate being late, it gives me really bad anxiety, but it's a really big pet peeve when other people are late, too. Also, when I'm flying and I'm reading my book or a magazine, and somebody reads over my shoulder? That happens a lot, and I don't know why, but it just makes me so uncomfortable." 10. Taco Bell is her fast food pleasure. "It was my favorite when I was eating it all the time. The Doritos Locos Tacos, those were just — I was like, 'Really, you're going to put Doritos and everything that makes Taco Bell just amazing inside of it? Like, I'm going to die.' So good."
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6 Things No One Tells You About Long-Distance Relationships

The story never gets old: A girl meets a boy. They fall head over heels in love to realize later on one is bound to leave somewhere far.

My story, however, comes with a little twist. I traveled nearly 6,000 miles from home to get lost in thick Indonesian jungles with a person living in my hometown. Yet, moving to France in just a month after we return from the trip.

While I desperately wished to quit my job, pack my bags I couldn’t. Saying immediate good-bye forever at that point would have torn my heart apart as well. So I opted for that type of relationships I never believed could work — long-distance relationship (LDR).

Two years fast-forward, we are still together. We are still in love and I now have two homes in two different countries where I spend equal amount of time.

There’s one important most thing I need to tell you upfront: Long-distance relationships suck. You may eventually discover some positive aspects, but on your “bad days” you will curse each mile separating you.

Yet, if you ask me, “Is it actually worth to get into LDR?

Absolutely. Every. Single. (Pun intended). Minute.

If you found yourself at the point when you need to decide whether love on the distance is possible for you, here are some important things I have learned the hard way.

1. You got a free ticket for an emotional non-stop roller-coaster ride.

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I have always thought of myself as a big girl who doesn’t cry. The first month of LDR turned me into a total weepie.

It’s not that we weren’t doing “good”. It’s just due to complete novelty of the situation; I have experienced a vast variety of feelings from deep, depressive sadness to anger, joy, anxiety, enthusiasm and everything in between.

If you think it gets better in time, sorry, it doesn’t.

You will still have “good days” when you do your daily chores, feel excited about something, have fun times with friends. And there would be bad days. Terribly wrong days full of self-pity, heart-wrenching loneliness and drilling pain.

When you are together, your joy and happiness can’t be tamed. When you are apart, your sadness grows to the size of your personal universe.

2. You will become really creative in filling up your time.

To avoid the sadness consuming me, I started to get creative with keeping my brains occupied most of the day. I took language classes, learnt to cook a few dozens of new dishes, started biking regularly into the countryside, worked long hours, started a blog, revived some long-forgotten friendships, de-cluttered my flat, gave away my clothes and did some charity projects.

My partner started learning to play the guitar, learned to skate, became a pro-chess player, continued to study another language and make new friends and useful professional connections in his new home country.

Now you get the point, you will have a lot of “waiting” time you will need to productively waste unless you don’t want to be a sad girl all the time.

3. You will have a lot of tough choices to make.

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Let’s start with some relatively simple questions both of you will need to answer honestly: “Where is this all heading?” and “What’s next?”; “How do you see our future together?” and “How can we close the distance?”

Add to the above developing the ultimate visiting schedule, shared expenses and financial planning, plus questions from all sort of random folks asking when/why don’t you get married or dump him.

4. Your friends’ may not be as supportive as you think.

If they are not in LDR as well, they won’t get all of your woes and complains 75 percent of the times. They will sound as sympathetic and compassionate as they can, but deep down inside you know they don’t understand your feelings.

Some would be much worse, asking seemingly hilarious questions like: “Does your boyfriend even exist?”, “How do you cope with the physical aspect of being in relationships?” and “Maybe you should date someone else?”.

Right. And than a cat becomes a dog.

5. In time, you develop an odd feeling of sureness.

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Your relationships are definitely not about sex. You are rather friends without benefits when you are not together. If that’s not true love, why would each if you bother to sustain this whole thing?

You are very honest with your partner and can share anything in person or online — fears, dreams, hopes, pain, insecurities. Suddenly, “jealousy” becomes an empty word for you as you grow a thousand per cent sure in your partner.

6. You will make it till the end.

I have never believed long-distance relationships work. I was proved wrong.

You will make it through. You can be a happy couple even if you don’t share one zip code.

If it is your person, you will survive everything together and make it through all the future couple struggles and life difficulties.

You can read more stories of life and travel at Elena’s blog or check out the latest pictures at @elenastravelgram

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7 Things I Learned on My Journey to True Love

2015-08-19-1439995202-2034426-IMG_7933.jpegAs you may have heard, I met the love of my life through The Huffington Post. Who knew a mouthy manifesto I wrote after a bad post-divorce date would lead me to my very own Magic Mike, a man who makes me giggle like a school girl on HuffPost Live?

Honestly, being struck by lightening and resuscitated by Channing Tatum himself would have seemed more in the realm of possibility.

You see, I have had a black cloud stalking me for decades. At 42, I have done it all… dating (high school, college, adult… oh my!), flings, short-and long-term relationships, tripping down the aisle. Nursing a shattered heart, I convinced myself that I gave birth to the man who would piece me back together. I flirted. I dated. I dreamed. But I didn’t think my soulmate was in the forecast.

Here’s seven things I learned on my terrifyingly dark, unpaved third world country type of road to happiness (chock full of I-need-a-barf-bag-to-deal-with-twists-and-turns moments).

1. It happens when you least expect it. It’s so annoying but it’s so true. If you told me my dream guy would read my post, which was basically designed to rip men a collective new a$ $ , and relate to my rant enough to craft a thoughtful response, I would have laughed. Hell, I would have scoffed. Cackled, maybe. But that’s exactly what happened.

2. Be fierce. Repeatedly striking out in love is a gift. When you f*ck up, you lose your fear of failure. Empowered by my perfectly imperfect track record, I was unabashedly myself when I met Mike. I didn’t sacrifice one ounce of who I am and he adores me anyway.

3. Be open (just not in a prostitute kind of way). Date against type, my friends. I am infatuated with a man I would have discounted under traditional dating circumstances. I am a serial plant killer and he is a gardner extraordinaire. Come football season, we will be screaming for different teams in our living room. We will definitely vote for sparring politicians. But, wow, the synergy, the sparks, the soulful love we have is undeniable.

4. Kiss frogs. Come on now, don’t be shy. Every single frog — even the wart covered ones who get off hearing themselves ribbit — are a value add. They teach you about yourself if you listen. They bring you closer to your proverbial prince.

5. It’s cosmic. Finding true love is a spiritual awakening. It’s intuitive. You just know. When you cross paths with your soulmate, love blooms faster than a celebrity dons extensions after a bad haircut. It’s involuntary.

A soul connection differs from a honeymoon phase type of giddiness. The person is a natural extension of you, without warning, without effort, without compromise. The attraction is wild. When you hold hands, there’s an electric current, there’s a perfect fit. The amount of time you’ve been together doesn’t matter; the time you spent apart does.

6. Haters exist. Some people despise happy endings. They don’t believe in fairytales. Others are jealous. I have a friend who has been dismissive about my relationship since the beginning. Readers have left dozens of negative comments. I knew the first time I spoke to Mike that he was like no other. He understood me without explanation. Trust your gut, the telltale signs, the palpable energy. Haters be damned.

7. Live in hope. I have paid my misery dues for a lifetime. I buried my beautiful mom and filed for divorce months later. I have been lied to, spit on, let down. I have felt excruciating pain. I have been emotionally abandoned. I have lost. I ended relationships that weren’t right even though I knew I would be criticized for my choices. Despite everything, I always basked in the rays of hope. I believed in brighter tomorrows. And, finally, my day has come.

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Divorce – The Huffington Post

Need to File for a Divorce!

7 Things To Talk About With A Girl That Make Her Like You

What follows here are 7 things to talk about with a girl. These things will lead her to have a more positive view of you and in turn get her to like you. The topics are particularly useful for the guy that runs into the trouble of not knowing what to say to girl to keep the conversation going while keeping it interesting enough for her to want to continue talking to him.
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2 Things Your Wedding Guests Really Care About—and 1 Thing They Just Don’t

Of course your wedding day is mostly about swapping vows and becoming husband and wife.* But if you’re hosting a traditional wedding with guests and a dinner {a.k.a. A Giant Party}, it’s also about your…


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18 Real Things Donald Trump Has Actually Said About Women

Donald Trump claims to “cherish” women, but his actions — and words — suggest otherwise. 

Fox News’ Megyn Kelly called him out on his sexist behavior during the GOP debate on August 6, reminding him: “You have called women you don’t like ‘fat pigs’, ‘dogs’, ‘slobs’, and ‘disgusting animals.” 

 Trump laughed off the question, claiming he doesn’t “have the time for total political correctness.” Later, Trump called Kelly a “bimbo” and said that he “didn’t recognize” the remarks she was referencing. 

Well, we recognize them. 

Trump has consistently insulted, belittled, sexualized and stereotyped women. He has also taken the time to personally insult individual notable women like Sarah Jessica Parker, Rosie O’Donnell, Cher, Bette Midler, and others. 

 Here are 18 of the most outrageous things Trump has said about women:

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Comedy – The Huffington Post
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5 Things Your Divorce Attorney Wants To Tell You But Doesn’t

The relationship you have with your lawyer is sacrosanct. When you retain a lawyer, whether for a divorce or another issue, the lawyer is ethically charged with holding what you say to him/her as confidential. That means your attorney cannot talk about your case in public or to third parties without your consent.

There are exceptions to this, but I’ll save that for another article.

Going through a divorce is a stressful time. It’s stressful for both you as the person getting divorced and for the attorney who is representing you. There’s a saying within legal circles that “criminal law deals with bad people at their best and family law deals with good people at their worst.” From my experience, I can’t argue with that.

Put yourself in your attorneys shoes. How would you handle yourself in your case? Odds are it is not an easy situation. And, unless you hired an attorney who just graduated law school, you’re not your attorney’s only client. I know you don’t want to hear that, but…it’s true.

Divorce attorneys work hard to achieve favorable and fair results for their clients. Good clients appreciate the effort, even if things don’t always work out the way they hoped. Many clients are never happy, win or lose, and are not afraid to let their attorney know it. After all, who wants to spend all that money and feel like they lost? I get it.

Here are five things your attorney really wants to tell you, but doesn’t because he wants to maintain the relationship and keep you as a client. You’re better off knowing this though because it will influence your relationship with your lawyer and the value he/she provides to you.

1. You call too often. It’s true…you do. If you get your legal bill at the end of the month and you are astonished at how high it is…the culprit often times is the number of phone calls made to your attorney. Most attorneys charge on an hourly basis, which is stated in your retainer agreement. Clients pay for an attorney’s time.

Your attorney is not your therapist, although I play one on t.v. I always tell clients I will talk to you as long as you want, but don’t be surprised when you get the bill. I understand the client’s need to vent and talk it out. It’s very important, but that’s more the job of a therapist. If you’re going to spend money, might as well do so to a qualified professional counselor.

Your attorney will contact you when he/she needs something from you. There are periods in every case where nothing is going on and there is down time. Your attorney should give you periodic updates on the status of things and it’s ok to check in yourself, but daily calls are unnecessary and only run up your bill.

Try to handle little disputes with your spouse on your own. Then, if you can’t resolve it, think about how bad it really is and whether it’s worth it to involve your attorney. Good attorneys will tell their clients that something is not worth the cost of their time to fight it. In the end, it’s the client’s decision, but again…don’t complain when you get a high bill.

2. You don’t help him help you. Remember, your attorney is YOUR advocate, even if you don’t always feel that’s the case. However, he is not a mind reader. Your attorney can only work with what you tell him and what documents you give him to back up what you tell him. He cannot make it rain when the sun is out if you know what I mean.

My best clients are the ones who come to me prepared. I mean, they come to a meeting with a binder, organized with tabs for bank accounts, retirement accounts, credit card statements and any other documents I ask for or they think I will need. This cuts down the time I need to go through them and find what I’m looking for…which in turn lowers their bill!

Other times, clients just don’t listen to what their attorney tells them to do. Remember, an attorney charges for their time. The more time you make them spend on your case, or repeating themselves to you, the higher your bill will be.

Help your attorney help you!

3. You don’t listen to his advice when he gives it, so what’s the point? I had a case that involved a high conflict custody dispute. I told my client how to handle a certain situation when it came up and what happens? I get a call from this client to find out they did the exact opposite of what I told them and now they were in a pickle and expected me to get them out of it. I felt bad, BUT, if they had listened to me they wouldn’t be in this situation.

Attorneys expect clients to listen to them. That’s why they are there. If you as a client didn’t want to listen to your attorney, why did you hire them to begin with?

4. He can’t continue to represent you because you are not paying his bills. Attorneys are not free. They get paid for provide you with their time, knowledge and services. Now, it’s often the case in a divorce that money is tight and most attorneys are sensitive to this, but they have to pay their bills too and can’t work for free.

You can’t expect them to work for free. You don’t walk into a store and expect to take what you want and not pay, right?

You have to communicate with your attorney on a regular basis and if money becomes an issue, have that discussion. But, don’t ask your attorney to rush and file an emergency application because your ex is threatening not to give you the children on your weekend if you haven’t been paying your legal bill.

5. You chose to have children and now you have to parent them, either with your ex or alone. If I had to bet, I would say that one of the reasons you are getting divorced, or already divorced is because of conflicts with your spouse over parenting. It’s very common and one of the more stressful phases of a divorce. There is no way of getting around it though…you have to co-parent effectively with your ex, or you will be knee deep in court battles and conflict for years to come.

Your attorney is there to help you learn how to co-parent well. It is a learned skill set. You have to learn to accept and work with your spouse’s different parenting style. You won’t agree with everything they do, but unless it amounts to neglect or abuse, you will have no choice. This is the bed you made by choosing to have children with this person and now you have to learn to co-parent with them in a post divorce world.

I hope this wasn’t too harsh. Remember, your attorney is on YOUR side. A divorce is a roller coaster ride with its share of ups and downs. You are a team and you need to work together to get the best results for your case.

Jason Levoy, a/k/a The Divorce Resource Guy, is an attorney who teaches people without a lawyer how to navigate the divorce process and represent themselves in court. He regularly provides free advice via his blog, VIP newsletter and Private Divorce Facebook Group.

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The Middle of Things – J. S. Fletcher

J. S. Fletcher - The Middle of Things  artwork

The Middle of Things

J. S. Fletcher

Genre: Classics

Price: $ 0.99

Publish Date: June 30, 2015

Publisher: Open Road Media Mystery & Thriller

Seller: OpenRoad Integrated Media, LLC


A classic of detective fiction’s golden age, featuring a mysterious murder, a wrongful accusation, and an intrepid man determined to find the truth Young Viner is a gentleman through and through. Born into means that blessed him with a life of leisure, one night his tranquil evening walk is nevertheless upset when he stumbles upon a corpse in Markendale Square. The police believe the murderer is an old friend of Viner’s, a man recently down on his luck, who was caught attempting to sell some of the victim’s belongings. But Viner is certain they have the wrong man. With the help of his plucky and clever aunt Bethia Penkridge, a mystery-novel aficionado with a mind for solving puzzles, Viner will stop at nothing to clear his friend’s good name and find the true murderer before it’s too late.   Considered a grandfather of the modern detective story, J. S. Fletcher wrote more than two hundred books in his storied career, and The Middle of Things is one of his most acclaimed works.   This ebook has been professionally proofread to ensure accuracy and readability on all devices. J. S. Fletcher (1863–1935) was a British journalist and author, considered to be a leading writers of the Golden Age of detective fiction. Fletcher published over 100 detective novels, including many following PI Ronald Camberwell.

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Men, Here Are Some OK, But Still Not Really OK, Things To Say To Women

We can’t stress this enough: just don’t catcall women.

But if you’re absolutely forced to — maybe as a part of some twisted “Saw”-like test — here are some pretty funny catcalls that are about as close to acceptable as you can get.

 

 

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Comedy – The Huffington Post
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Sway In the Morning: Maino Says, “To Feed My Kids I Had To Do Violent Things”

In a sit down with one of Brooklyn’s finest, Maino explains how he has a second life on his new mixtape King of Brooklyn 3 and breaks down the need that he had to do violent things to feed his daughter who is now 3 years old. Check the interview below, it gets real in the streets and nobody knows like Maino having got a chance to turn things around for the better.


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8 Things You Might Not Know About Jerry Garcia


News, reviews, interviews and more for top artists and albums – MSN Music
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People Places Things – James C. Strouse

James C. Strouse - People Places Things  artwork

People Places Things

James C. Strouse

Genre: Comedy

Price: $ 14.99

Rental Price: $ 6.99

Release Date: August 14, 2015


When the mother of his children abruptly leaves him for another man, graphic novelist Will (Jemaine Clement) must juggle dual careers, twin daughters and the daunting prospect of midlife dating while attempting to find himself in the process.

© © 2015 Beachside Films LLC

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The End of All Things: Old Man’s War, Book 6 (Unabridged) – John Scalzi

John Scalzi - The End of All Things: Old Man's War, Book 6 (Unabridged)  artwork

The End of All Things: Old Man’s War, Book 6 (Unabridged)

John Scalzi

Genre: Sci Fi & Fantasy

Price: $ 21.95

Publish Date: August 11, 2015

© ℗ © 2015 Audible Studios

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The Top 10 Things We Learned From Nelly On The Breakfast Club [Photos]

Whether you know it or not; Nelly is still moving out here. The St. Louis rapper stopped by The Breakfast Club to talk new music, new business ventures and more.

Now with a successful reality television show in it’s second season, Mo feels more confident than ever in his legacy.

DJ Envy, Angela Yee and Charlamagne Tha God get him to discuss marriage rumors, rap battles, NBA ownership and more.

So we present the top 10 things we learned from Nelly on The Breakfast Club. Thoughts on LL Cool J putting the pressure on him? Sound off below.

Photo: Power 105 / Youtube

The post The Top 10 Things We Learned From Nelly On The Breakfast Club [Photos] appeared first on Hip-Hop Wired.

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We Sing. We Dance. We Steal Things – Jason Mraz

Jason Mraz - We Sing. We Dance. We Steal Things  artwork

We Sing. We Dance. We Steal Things

Jason Mraz

Genre: Pop

Price: $ 5.99

Release Date: May 12, 2008

© ℗ 2008 Atlantic Recording Corporation for the United States and WEA International Inc. for the world outside of the United States. All Rights Reserved.

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7 Things We Loved from Copenhagen Fashion Week

Asger Juel Jarsen Copenhagen Fashion Week

Copenhagen Fashion Week might run a lot shorter than most, but you’d be surprised how much the Danes manage to pack into the three-day schedule. Between Victoria’s Secret model sightings (Josephine Skriver, here’s looking at you!) and royalty in the front row, there’s a laid-back sense of glamour about the shows that’s distinctly Scandinavian. Between Henrik Vibskov’s fantastic living set and the discovery of a brand new Nordic girl crush, see the seven biggest moments that topped our CFW agenda.

The post 7 Things We Loved from Copenhagen Fashion Week appeared first on Vogue.

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5 Things You Should Never Do Before Sex

A recent study proved what many post 50s already know — older people are having sex. A lot of sex. Clearly, they know a thing or two about getting in the mood. But here are some things they — and everyone else — need to know before hopping into bed with someone to guarantee a good time — and they have nothing to do with strawberries or chocolates.

1. Don’t eat a heavy meal. 

No, we’re not just worried about bad breath and flatulence. We’re worried you might fall asleep before the opportune moment. Think of sex as a workout. You wouldn’t wolf down heaping portions of creamy pastas and decadent desserts before hitting the gym, now would you? 

Yes, the “food coma” is pretty real. Carby, fatty and sugary foods can all trigger a pretty strong slow-down signal to your brain as soon as they hit your gut. The signal tells your brain to slow down so the body can focus on the task at hand — digesting all the food you just chowed down. As you eat more and more, your body releases more insulin in the digestion process — which only leads to increased serotonin and melatonin in the brain — making you drowsy. 

2. Don’t drink too much. 

Not only do you want to make sure you will remember your lovemaking sesh, you want to make sure you’re at peak performance for it. While light drinking can put some people in the mood, heavy drinking dulls your sensations, making arousal and orgasm difficult. Alcohol also dilates your blood vessels, making it difficult to maintain an erection when you have high blood alcohol content. 

3. Don’t worry about how you look. 

Stop scrutinizing your muffin top or examining your thigh gap. Feeling self-conscious about your body can hurt your sex life as you might be less likely to initiate sex or even be able to enjoy it. If you’re too worried about how you look, your wandering mind will make it more difficult to get satisfaction. Stop worrying and start enjoying.

4. Don’t forget the lube. 

 After menopause, vaginal dryness is a problem quite a few women experience — which can sometimes make you reluctant to have sex. Lower estrogen levels in the body can make your vaginal tissues thinner and lead to dryness. Doctors can prescribe creams, tablets and other estrogen therapies to help reverse the thinning, but lube used prior to intercourse is a simple, effective measure. Gynecologist Cheryl Iglesia told The Huffington Post that water-based and/or silicone-based lubricants are an option. Water-based lubes tend to be less irritating, she says, while silicone-based ones can last longer. 

5. Don’t forget to pee (before and after). 

Iglesia says that, for older people with bladder issues, going to the bathroom before can help avoid any discomfort or embarrassing incidents.

And of course, there’s peeing afterwards, which you might have heard can help prevent UTIs. Sex can push bacteria into your urethra, which is why it’s good to pee afterwards. Iglesia says it’s particularly important for post-menopausal women. She says that after menopause, lower estrogen means a rise in the vagina’s pH and an upswing in bacteria. 

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Divorce – The Huffington Post

Need to File for a Divorce!

Most Things Haven’t Worked Out – Junior Kimbrough

Junior Kimbrough - Most Things Haven't Worked Out  artwork

Most Things Haven’t Worked Out

Junior Kimbrough

Genre: Blues

Price: $ 7.92

Release Date: March 25, 1997

© ℗ 1997 Fat Possum Records

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Things I Forgot – EP – Son Little

Son Little - Things I Forgot - EP  artwork

Things I Forgot – EP

Son Little

Genre: Alternative

Price: $ 4.99

Release Date: November 7, 2014

© ℗ 2014 Anti, Inc.

iTunes Store: Top Albums in Alternative

Awake During Brain Surgery: 5 Bizarre Things You Experience

By Emily Leighty,Anonymous,Amanda Mannen  Published: August 04th, 2015 


Cracked: All Posts

Gamescom: 5 Things Learned at Europe’s Answer to E3


‘Mad Max’ could break the film-to-video-game curse but Sony’s absence spells trouble for Europe’s biggest video game conference.

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5 Things We Learned at the Museum of Moving Images’s “How Cats Took Over the Internet”

cats take over internet museum of moving image

As we all know, the human population is divided into two types: cat people and dog people. I’ve always identified as the latter, and consequently have spent the past 20 years (give or take) blithely ignorant of the Internet viral cat video phenomenon.

But suddenly I’ve been presented with a fast-track opportunity to play catch-up, in the form of the Museum of Moving Images’s new show, “How Cats Took Over the Internet.” Yesterday after work I trudged out to Long Island City to check it out, ahead of the official opening today.

Organized by the museum’s Associate Curator of Digital Media, Jason Eppink (decked out at the preview in a teal polo shirt, fuchsia shorts, and socks pulled up to hug his calves), the show focuses on cat videos not as art objects, but as important pieces of vernacular culture.

“My M.O. is to take a silly subject and address it seriously,” Eppink told Vogue.com by phone a few days ago. “There’s this assumed narrative that’s the backdrop of what happens on the web, this whole pejorative way of talking about the Internet as the place you waste your time [watching] cat videos. I think there’s a sort of hell in a handbasket thinking to any new technology. There are probably good reasons why we’re doing this. Let’s take a look at it and trace its history.”



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Photo: Courtesy of Museum of the Moving Image

That’s exactly what the show does, examining the evolution of the phenomenon from the earliest days of the World Wide Web in the mid-nineties to the present. There’s also a study of what the cat-video equivalent is in other cultures around the world, an examination of whether cats truly are more Internet-popular than dogs, and a 24-minute greatest hits video, organized by Will Braden, curator of the Internet Cat Video Festival at Minneapolis’s Walker Arts Center, and featuring such viral triumphs as 2012’s Boots and Cats and 2009’s Fat Cat in Pot (attempt 2).

So did this show convert me to the ranks of cat lovers? Nope, but I did learn a lot (read on for more on that). And, for whatever it’s worth, I also spent some time this morning falling down the rabbit hole of this LOLcat translator.

I CAN LERN 2 LUV VIDEOS OV KATS? Only time will tell. Below, five major takeaways from “How Cats Took Over the Internet.”

1. The biggest feline celebrities tend to have medical disorders

To name a few: Grumpy Cat suffers from feline dwarfism, Lil Bub has osteopetrosis, a rare bone-density disorder, Lazarus has a cleft palette, Monty lacks a nasal bridge. Why is this a thing? It all comes down to Kindchenschema, the theory of cuteness: We’re attracted to creatures that are “infantile and powerless,” says Eppink, which “triggers caring in adults.” In other words, the only thing we find cuter than a regular cat, with its infant-like “large head and eyes and small nose and mouth” is a cat made extra vulnerable by a disability.



cat taking over internet

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Photo: Courtesy of Museum of the Moving Image

2. Cats are not actually more popular than dogs on the Internet

The museum looked at tags and descriptors on Buzzfeed, Tumblr, Reddit, and YouTube, and discovered that Tumblr is the only platform on which cats trump dogs. So why the cat video meme? In real life, “liking dogs is way more socially OK,” explains Eppink. Cat ownership carries more negative connotations (think: crazy cat ladies). So while cat people may be timid about geeking out over their cats in real life, they’re more comfortable doing it on the Internet. There’s also the “virtual cat park” theory coined by Jack Shepherd, the editorial director of Buzzfeed: Because cats are generally indoor animals, the web has become a space where cat owners can interact the way dog owners do at dog parks.

3. Cats are better video subjects than dogs

Dogs tend to acknowledge the camera; cats don’t, which makes cat videos feel more authentic and voyeuristic. The show compares them to surveillance videos.

4. LOLcats goes way back

I CAN HAZ CHEEZBURGER? That now-familiar voice may actually derive from the early days of the web. Members of a newsgroup forum for cat lovers back in 1995 started a practice of role-playing as their cats, using a baby-ish way of speaking that became known as MeowChat. Eppink thinks that group may have lead to the much newer LOLcats phenomenon, in which funny pictures of cats are paired with off-kilter cat-voiced captions. Interestingly MeowChat, Eppink adds, may have itself derived from an even earlier WoofChat, which was, of course, inspired by dogs.

5. The animal video thing is culturally specific

Cats, perhaps unsurprisingly, are really popular on the Internets of North America, Western Europe, and Japan. But in other cultures, other animals reign supreme. For example, Ugandans are into goats and chickens, Mexicans prefer llamas, and China is all about the river crab and grass-mud horse, which have real function as ways to subvert government Internet censors.



cat taking over internet

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Photo: Courtesy of Grace Coddington / @therealgracecoddington

The post 5 Things We Learned at the Museum of Moving Images’s “How Cats Took Over the Internet” appeared first on Vogue.

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25 Things That We Need to Bring Back From the 1990s

The 1990s were a simpler time. Shoulder pads were still socially acceptable, millennials did not yet know that they could make zero dollars an hour writing articles on the internet telling the world how great they are and Sally Jesse Raphael still graced our television screens every afternoon. Yes, it was a wonderful time and I am happy to report that it seems as though everything old is new once again. With Space Jam getting a much deserved sequel, reboots of Full House and The X Files in the works and The Limited Too set to reopen its doors next year, and god willing a Clinton in the White House again next year, the 1990s are making a serious comeback. So while we are reliving the vida loca, here are a few other things that Americas should welcome back from the greatest decade to make this world a better place to live in. As if!

1. Slap Bracelets — Kids these days are too soft. It’s time for this cool accessory that also doubles as a weapon to make a return. As far as I am concerned, there is no better fashion statement to make on the playground than cheaply made zebra patterned piece of fabric that also doubles as switchblade.

2. Lip Smackers — Why wouldn’t you want to walk around with you mouth tasting of Dr. Pepper, kettle corn or salted pretzel (yes, that is a real flavor) all day? And nothing says “I love you,” quite like rolling up to your girlfriends house, laying one on her and smelling of cherry cream soda for the remainder of the day.

3. Passing Notes — Kids these days swap text messages in between classes to communicate, but what to do when you need to destroy evidence from parents? Come on guys — notes written on papers are so much easier to destroy than iPhones. And less expensive.

4. Family Matters — Yes, we are all excited that The Tanners are coming back into our lives next years, but can’t we throw the Winslow’s a bone? I would love to know what Carl and the gang are up to these days and if they ever found their youngest daughter who mysteriously disappeared without a trace.

5. Spice Girls — This needs no explanation.

6. Beanie Babies — I personally would like to bring these back because after years of collecting and hoarding them and thinking they were going to appreciate in value, it turns out they aren’t worth shit.

7. Lisa Frank — The unsung hero of gay pride. Everything was a rainbow with this woman — unicorns, dolphins, princesses, kitty cats. Time to make your way back to the forefront, girl. The world could use a few more rainbow hummingbird lunch boxes is in it.

8. The Macarena — The Bar Mitzvah circuit has not been the same since this song went out of style. Because nothing says: “Mazol Tov Jordan Abromowitz” quite like watching your over weight middle aged aunt who’s in a dress two sizes too small trying to navigate her way through the world’s least complicated dance moves.

9. Frosted Tips — You know what I’m talking about, all of the members of N*SYNC. I loved my frosted tips and (not-so-secretly) wish they’d be in style again in places outside of Alabama. They were like a yellow ray of hope in an otherwise dishwater brown mess of a mane.

10. Dunk-a-roos — What a messed up world we live in where a kid can’t go to school, eat his or her lunch and top it off with a delicious snack that consists of a cookie that you dip in icing. What is this? Communist Russia?

11. Jonathan Taylor Thomas — my beloved, where have you gone? Was the local chapter of the fan club I started for you not enough? Come back to us. We will embrace you as we did before and make you an even bigger, brighter star.

12. Pogs — Kids these days are so lucky that they have so many options when it comes to play time. I say, bring the circular, cardboard cut-out dishes that cost a shocking amount of money back to toy stores. They teach you things like … how to count? I don’t actually know what they were for but I loved them and would gladly welcome them back into my house (psyche-out, I still have all of mine from middle school!)

13. The Mickey Mouse Club — While Disney still churns out the stars as quickly as one of the Kardashian girls has a pregnancy scare, nothing will top the 1990s revival of The Mickey Mouse Club that brought Britney Spears, Ryan Gosling, Justin Timberlake and many others into the world. But NOT Jessica Simpson. You lose Jessica Simpson.

14. Mall Madness — a game that it supposed to teach you how devastating credit card debt can be which was a lesson that clearly didn’t resonate with me or my gambling addiction.

15. The Babysitter’s Club — Ann M. Martin, where art thou? This series of books taught every young girl (and closeted gay kid) the value of opening a small business, the trials of tribulations of having a friend with diabetes, how to gloss over your friend (Claudia — I’m looking at you) being a slut but being able to see the best in her and how to include your frumpy and kind of ugly friend (Mallory) without making her feel left out. These a lessons every 2015 child needs too, damn it!

16. Taylor Dayne — It’s my opinion that global warming with reverse its course, ISIS will throw down their weapons and Greece’s economy will bounce back if the world was given one more Diane Warren penned power ballad that included a sexy saxophone solo sung by Taylor Dayne.

17. Carmen San Diego — How in the hell are children supposed to know where things are these days? By reading? Please! I would have no idea where Tierra del Fuego was if it weren’t for this fedora wearing, trench coat loving renegade.

18. Tetris — I wouldn’t know how to move furniture into a truck without this game and no one who as ever helped me move who is under the age of twenty-five knows how to either which is reason enough to bring this gem back.

19. Gushers — When I was a fat kid growing up, Gushers were the only “fruit” I consumed. They were not only delicious, but because they tasted like strawberries, grapes and kiwis, they were nutritious too!

20. The Oregon Trail — not sure what this computer game was supposed to teach you, but had I not played it as a child, I would have never known what dysentery was or that I could die from it at any moment and without warning.

21. Ricky Martin’s Career — Those two magical years we spent together were years I will never forget, Ricky. We thought you were in it for the long haul after you ushered Latin pop music into America. Now we’re just somehow stuck with Pitbull.

22. MTV — It’s called “Music Television” not “Shows About Unwed Mothers Having Babies Television.” Remember waiting all day by the television to see the “Oops… I Did It Again” music video on TRL and then taping it on a VHS and playing it over and over again so that you could learn the dance moves and be just like Britney? Well, I do.

23. Models, Inc.90210 got a revival. Melrose Place got a revival. When’s it going to be Models, Inc‘s turn? Nothing is more entertaining than a bunch of models and their super hot photographer boyfriends sleeping around and occasionally shooting each other for no reason. I know, the cheese stands alone on this one, but at the rate the entertainment industry is going we are bound for a Models Inc. 2.0 eventually.

24. Slang — “Talk to the hand cause the face a’int listening” could very well make its way into present day vernacular, with a few tweaks of course. “Talk to the hand bae, cause your basic face a’int on fleek.” Or something to that affect. Meanwhile, I still says things are “da bomb” likes it’s 1996.

And finally #25 — someone needs to find a way to bring Jonathan Brandis back from the dead IMMEDIATELY! #seaQUEST4LIFE.

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5 Things You Probably Never Knew About Lucille Ball

Today, August 6th, would have been Lucille Ball’s 104th birthday! Though America’s favorite redhead passed away long ago, in 1989, she’s still very much alive in our hearts and homes as millions of viewers tune in to watch her hysterical antics on our beloved show, “I Love Lucy.” 

We know that Lucille — or “Lucy” as we like to think of her — could make us laugh like no one else, but here are some little-known facts about the comedian that you may not know.

1. She wasn’t always Lucy. 

Before the world knew her as Lucy Ricardo, a young Lucille Ball started her career as a model, using the name, “Diane Belmont.” She reportedly thought the name sounded more glamorous than her birth name and is said to have gotten the idea after driving by the Belmont Race Track in New York. We have to admit, it does have a ring to it. 

 2. Her pregnancy on the show was very real. 

It came as a surprise when Lucy was said to be “expecting” on the show … after all, she and Ricky had separate beds. The p-word was never mentioned on the show. Given the times, show execs were afraid they would offend audiences, as the pregnancy would insinuate the couple did indeed have sex. Lucy was TV’s first pregnant character, though she was just said to be ‘spectin. It so happened that the episode when Lucy gave birth to little Ricky was aired on the same day that Lucille delivered her second child, Desi Jr., in a cesarean birth. 

3. She wasn’t a true redhead. 

 

Although her vivid red hair came to be her trademark, Lucy was actually a natural brunette. She first dyed her hair blonde early in her career when she landed her first roles in Hollywood. In the early 1950s, she was urged to dye her hair red by MGM and she agreed. Her hair color was actually a “golden apricot,” according to her hair stylist, and she used a henna rinse, which they kept under lock and key. 

4. She wasn’t a star student.

 

As a teenager, Lucy enrolled in a New York City drama school to work on her acting but found she was often too nervous to perform in front of her peers. The school sent her mother a letter saying that she was too “shy and reticent” to be a successful student. Boy, were they wrong. 

5. She found love again, after her marriage to Desi Arnaz ended.

Lucy and Ricky may not have gotten their happy ending in real life, but Lucy did remarry after her 20-year marriage to Desi Arnaz ended in divorce. She married comedian Gary Morton in the early ’60s and they stayed married until she died in 1989. 

No doubt about it. We still love Lucy.

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8 Things Single Women Want Their Married Friends To Know

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I’m a 51-year-old married mother to twin teenage daughters. I am blessed to have many girlfriends — mostly married, several single — and feel like I’ve been a good friend to them, regardless of their marital status. Kind of like Stephen Colbert’s “I don’t see color.”

Or am I fooling myself?

After my article on women without children in midlife went viral and I got several requests to write about single women in midlife, I wondered … Am I as inclusive as I think toward my single female friends? Am I making assumptions or being insensitive at times?

So I polled over a dozen of these women and got some pretty consistent feedback. Here is what single women want their married friends to know.

1. Yes, it can be tough to be single in midlife
There clearly are challenges to being single in midlife, from the merely practical to the more deeply personal.

Some daily tasks are just plain difficult when you live on your own. Stephanie* explains: “It is harder to get stuff done around the house; there’s just as much work but only one person. There’s no handy husband and you often run the risk of being ripped off by workmen you hire. When you have to move or lift things, you have to call someone for help. It has to be planned, not spontaneous. You also have to lean on friends for a ride to or from some doctors’ appointments — a colonoscopy buddy.”

Single mothers in particular feel the weight of responsibility managing so much on their own: “A lot rides on my shoulders. I’m worn out being the initiator in my business, in parenting, on the home front, and for the whole personal side of my life. Just too many decisions to make morning, noon, and night,” says Bonnie.

Gertrude agrees, wishing she had a partner to lean on, “It would be nice if someone was waiting to see me at the end of the day, to give me that warm hug and to offer support when I am going through something.” Nights can be lonely: “You have a lot of lunches with married friends because dinner time is for their families. Sometimes that means you are home alone on a Saturday night, unless you have lots of single friends,” explains Stephanie.

Family members may have unfair expectations when it comes to their single middle-aged relatives, especially when they don’t have children, like Stephanie: “Even your parents treat you differently when you are single and childless, or at least mine do. Despite the fact that my parents are retired and in good health, they have always expected me to use my limited vacation time to travel to them for the holidays or other visits, even when I have had better accommodations for a visitor than they do. I crave the opportunity to entertain my family in my house, to show them that I can cook, decorate for the holidays, and be a good hostess.”

Some, like Gertrude, resent the pity: “Holidays with the family have been awkward many times, especially when my young niece and nephews have their significant others with them. ‘Poor Auntie,’ still alone on the holiday — they don’t say it, but I sense this is what they think.”

And traveling alone can be awkward. “I love to travel and many trips that I have gone on included couples. Some couples try to include me in events, but I do feel like the third wheel sometimes,” explains Gertrude. Tracy is lucky to have a travel companion but she gets grief for that: “My best friend and I have been accused of being lesbians because we don’t date, we take vacations together, and spend a lot of time together. I don’t get it. We enjoy each other’s company — who else are we supposed to spend time with?”

2. Please include me in your social plans — I promise, I won’t “throw off” the balance
Navigating social occasions can be challenging, even demeaning at times. “I love being invited to go along with friends, whether they are couples or a group of people, but I find many people ‘count’ the group to make sure it is ‘even.’ Or they invite you and another single woman and seat you together as though the two women were a couple,” says Sue. “Others feel sorry for the single woman and always invite a single man to go along (rarely the right idea). I remember being invited to a wedding of a colleague and being seated with her grandparents and their friends because there were ‘no other single women there’ when I would have much preferred to be with young couples.”

Katie agrees, “I have a friend who always talks about how she and her husband and this couple and that couple went out for a fun evening. It reminds me that I don’t bring the requisite male to the mix, therefore mess up the balance.” Anne adds: “I usually enjoy your husbands, partners and wives, so when I say, ‘bring him or her,’ I mean it. Why can’t the three of us go to dinner?”

Stephanie has seen a difference in the way she’s been treated socially when she’s had a significant other: “I am used to going to events alone and being around lots of couples, so I would love to be included. I am not sure why inviting a single person is perceived as throwing off the party. And at times when I have been in a relationship, it is amazing how much more I was included in social events.”

Helaine, who has kids, felt the shift after her divorce, “What I don’t understand is how before we all had plans as a family, but now no. Since you’re not friends with my ex, why did you stop inviting us over or accepting requests for family plans? Why can’t a married family still make plans with a divorced family?”

Ellie yearns for inclusion: “I would rather be asked to the dinner party, gala, concert, etc. and go alone, than to find out later and have friends say, ‘it was all couples, and I thought you would be uncomfortable!'”

3. Girlfriends, know that I rely on your friendships
Time and again, single women describe the added importance of their female friendships in their lives. “I don’t need a partner to feel complete, but I do need my friends. Please know how important you are to me. I may seem fine living like a hermit, but having friends I can call at any time makes me feel as though I’m not alone,” explains Anne.

Joanne is thrilled to have good friends: “I feel I hit the ‘girlfriends lottery’ because I was lucky enough to have friends who believed friendships were important enough to maintain, even after they got married.” She cautions, “It’s never cool to drop your friends after you get married. When I hear about mature women who get a man and just drop their friends, it’s a tough pill for me to swallow. Now I have to admit that when I was in my early 20s, I thought I was in love and I neglected my best friend, Carol. Thank God Carol was still there when I came back, tail between my legs. She never said anything about it but I vowed that I would never drop a friend like that again.”

Ellie has been on the receiving end of being dropped by married girlfriends — in her case, after her divorce: “It hurt, a lot. It sucks to have women who were once your friends decide that you are suddenly the devil because you are not with their husband’s bestie. One of them actually told me that we could still be friends as long as I didn’t bring up all of the ‘garbage.’ That ‘garbage’ was my life! I told her to fuck off.”

And when it comes to making new married friends, Sue is surprised at the attitude she sometimes encounters: “Some people think they have nothing in common with you because you have never been married, but some of my relationships have lasted longer than their marriages! It is so funny to me that my 9-to-10-year relationship doesn’t count but their 6-month marriage does — or their serial marriages, in some cases!”

4. Just because I’m single and 50 doesn’t mean I’m desperate and will date anyone
Many, but not all, women who are single in midlife would like to be in a relationship and do enjoy dating. Sue describes “that wonderful feeling of first dates, that thrill of starting over.” But most of them say that dating in your 40s and later can be hard, that there are not that many eligible men who are a good match.

Bonnie feels it’s particularly discouraging that “men my age want to date someone 10 to 20 years younger than them. What is going on? Are they for real? I want someone my age. I don’t want someone 10 to 20 years older than me.”

These women appreciate being set up by their friends but resent it when the bar is set too low. Stephanie explains, “They are anxious to match me up with someone they know, their only criteria being that he is also single — no regard for my likes or dislikes. When I don’t act interested in the guy they describe as an alcoholic, someone who has weird social skills, the devoutly religious man of a different religion than mine, the guy who is nice but a little slow, or the one who poisons squirrels in his back yard, they think I am being picky. My well-meaning elderly neighbor suggested that I should act dumb on the first few dates to attract a man, as I apparently scare them off with my immense intellect!”

Nicole agrees, “Just because I am not seeing someone does not mean I am desperate and will date just anyone. If I was not attracted to a type of guy before, what makes you think that will suddenly change just because I’m over 40?” She also wants to make sure married women understand that “as a single woman over 40 who lives alone and has no kids, I still like sex!”

And yes, like Stephanie, single women in midlife get accused of being too picky or demanding. Gertrude explains: “They think I’m only looking for a certain type of man, good-looking with a lot of money. I am not. I value honest, friendly, and nonjudgmental people in my life. I am a professional and would like to be with a professional partner, but if I don’t feel the right vibe, all of what he is or has does not matter.”

5. My future is no worse than yours — there are no guarantees in life
The women I interviewed have pretty realistic perspectives on the future. Bonnie admits, “After being single for 8 years, I wonder if I will be single for the rest of my life. I don’t think so as I think I’m just entering my prime years, but I sometimes wonder.”

Sue gets annoyed at the questions: “I’m tired of people saying, ‘Who will take care of you when you are older?’ One of my friends has been married three times and outlived three husbands; there are no guarantees in this life. Yes, sometimes I think about what will happen if I age and lose my capacities but it is what it is and, if you prepare things properly and have someone who can be your advocate and executor, you don’t have to worry.”

Joanne agrees wholeheartedly: “Young women make it a point to mention that they are not going to end up at 50-something without a man. But there is nothing that you can do in your younger years that will absolutely guarantee that you will have a man when you’re in your 50s, or that he will be around for the long run. I always wish new couples a long and wonderful life together, but please don’t be cocky because nothing is guaranteed.”

6. Please believe me when I say it: I am okay
Women who are single in midlife want the rest of us to know that, despite life’s normal ups and downs, they are doing just fine. In Marie‘s words: “Gay marriage has become accepted and transgendered people are now demanding acceptance; I think singlehood is the next frontier of social acceptance. As a single older woman, I want acceptance, not suspicion or assumptions. I am not damaged goods. I am not sad. I am not a reject. That smile you see on my face is genuine.”

Sue agrees, “Some people think you never married because you were selfish or too focused on your career or too picky. Did they ever think it just wasn’t meant to be your life and there is nothing wrong with being single?”

Cari, divorced mother of a 7-year-old, appreciates her newfound independence: “Being single at this point in my life has many benefits, mainly the ability to make my own decisions about my life without having to ‘check’ with anyone. I get to decide how the money is managed, what bills get paid off first, what school or summer camp is appropriate for my child. There are no differences of opinion, no debates, and no accommodations to be made. My single life is very productive and busy. I’ll admit, there are times it would be nice to have a second set of hands around the house or around me, and someday I may meet someone who I want to spend my life with, but for now I am enjoying my decision-making freedom immensely. Being financially independent means that I do not ‘need’ a man in my life to survive, but should I decide I ‘want’ a man in my life, there is no pressure to prove myself or my worth; either you enjoy my company or you don’t. I have been married and lonely and, believe me, that is much worse than being single, independent, and free.”

Stephanie agrees: “I didn’t ever expect to be single for my whole life, but so far it has worked out that way. And now that I am beyond the ‘baby years,’ I am actually pretty much ok with it and wonder if marriage is even one of my goals anymore. If I had married any of the men I thought I wanted to marry, I am pretty sure I would be divorced now anyway. I am happy with the life I have built and am lucky to be able to afford most things that I want on one income.”

“Sometimes single status is a choice, not a temporary unfortunate state that I am trying to change,” explains Katie. “Being single allows me to focus on my family and not have anyone making demands on my time that would interfere with this fleeting time my children are living at home. As my nest empties, I see endless possibilities in my next chapter. I am unencumbered by a spouse’s work life. I feel like a freshman in college again. The world is my oyster!”

7. Being married does not give you the right to be insensitive
It’s amazing what people feel they can say to women who are single in midlife. Here are some examples from Sue, a never-married single woman in her 60s: “When I moved to a new home and met new people, they seemed taken aback that I never married. I was greeted with ‘How could that be?’ and ‘For real, you never got married?’ or ‘Not even for a little while?’ One woman actually said ‘You should have gotten married and divorced so you could say you had been married.’ Crazy stuff!”

Sue also warns that people should not ask why you’ve never been married: “One friend of mine lost two fiancés to early deaths before they married and she absolutely hates to be asked this question.”

And watch the way you talk about single women with other partnered people. In Joanne’s words, “Once you hit 40, it’s automatically assumed ‘She has issues, or something is wrong with her, or she’s selfish, or she didn’t get married due to her career, or she must hate men, or she lives a sad and lonely existence.’ It’s the image of the ‘old spinster’ with a house full of cats. I feel lucky that my girlfriends look at me as the whole person that they know me to be and judge me solely on that, not on any narrow-minded definitions of single women over 40.”

Marie feels there are other stereotypes to watch for: “One is that we just might be a bit morally loose. One time, when my son had a new friend sleep over for the first time, the mom, who knew I was single and living alone, said, ‘You don’t have any boyfriends sleeping over, do you? I can’t let my son sleep over if you do.’ This same (married) woman ran away with her (married) church pastor a few months later!”

Single women want us to know that being single is just one small aspect of their very full lives. And they certainly don’t want our pity. In Marie’s words: “A college sorority sister, with whom I reconnected on social media after 35 years, messaged me to say, ‘Too bad your marriage didn’t work out; but at least you have a beautiful son.’ True, but evidence of my marital status is scant, while evidence of my great career, exciting expatriate years, and my fun times with friends are splashed all over Facebook every day.”

These women are often expected to dole out the gifts for every life event but would appreciate some reciprocity once in a while. Jodi explains, “You get a gift when you get engaged, another gift for the bachelorette party, and then an actual wedding gift. Then come the kids; some of my friends tell me what to get their kids, even when I don’t ask. And do I ever get a gift?” Gertrude agrees that is would be nice to receive “flowers or other gifts on special days.”

8. Once and for all, I’m not after your husband
Admittedly, the most shocking finding from these interviews was how often this apparent issue came up. So, all you married ladies, rest assured, most middle-aged single ladies are NOT flirting with your husbands. Here is just a sampling of what I heard…

Sue: “When women view us as a threat to their relationships, that is hurtful, as if they don’t trust you or think you have integrity. I wish my married friends understood I don’t want their spouses even if I appreciate spending time with them. I wish they understood that you can be friends with men and not threaten their marriage.”

Marie: “Married ladies, I am not after your husband. I honor your marriage and your friendship. Not all of us are trolling. We are busy raising our children and looking for our own Mr. Wonderful. Sure, there are exceptions, but don’t automatically assume I can’t be trusted when I chat with your husband at the intramural game. Rest assured we chat pleasantly and I make sure to mention you often.”

Gertrude: “I try not to make long conversations with the husband to prevent feelings that I want their man. I respect marriage and would never try to be with another person’s husband.”

Helaine: “This always comes up. I have been explicitly told to stay away from their husbands by two women, one to my face, one behind my back.”

Can we stop assuming and judging and lean in to understanding and acceptance? Are we all so different? Ellie sums it up: “I am one of you. I am trying every day to be a good mother, a good daughter, a good sister, a good granddaughter. I am working on myself, fighting my demons, winning sometimes, losing sometimes. I am a woman just like you.”

*Some names have been changed if requested by contributors.

Hélène Tragos Stelian writes about midlife reinventions on her blog www.nextactforwomen.com. Connect with her on Facebook and on Twitter

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